TONIGHT, on The Catholic Geek: Pirates and Alternate history

The Catholic Geek: Pirates and Alternate history 11/15 by We Built That Network | Culture Podcasts


<iframe width="100%" height="180px" src="http://percolate.blogtalkradio.com/offsiteplayer?hostId=533877&episodeId=8073987" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

Tonight, at 7 PM, EST, I will be talking with Fred Hembach on alternate history, including his latest book, The Devil's Dictum, where the United States of America was founded by pirates.

Frederick Gero Heimbach's fiction has appeared at Every Day Fiction and Liberty Island. He was editor of the podcast Protecting Project Pulp throughout its run. He can be found on the internet as Fredösphere and in the real world as a resident of Ann Arbor, Michigan, along with his family. The Devil's Dictum is his first novel.

Death in the family, Hence a few delays

A few things.

1) Before I say a single word, THIS MONDAY, November 16th, Kindle will see the release of Pius Origins, Pius Holidays, as well as a paperback and Kindle edition of Pius Tales. These will be as dirt cheap as Amazon will let me push them, people.  These are $.99 for the Kindles, and $7.99 for the paperback, and I'll be making them as free as possible as often as possible.

2) The radio show MAY have some interruptions. Why? Because I will not be at my house, at my computer, with my usual toys and scripts and stuff at my fingertips. Also, because I have no idea if the place I'm going will be able to access Blog Talk Radio.  Why? Because BTR is built by absolute dummies.  Also, because I have no idea if I'll have the time to do a two-hour show, and I'm not sure if I can done THIS MINUTE.  I might be able to persuade Matthew Bowman to do the show again for the next week or two, or I may not. So, no idea.

3)  Blog posts will be haphazard for a while. Unless some people want to offer me guest posts.

4) If you want details about who died / who's dying, where died, how died ... no. Sorry. I'm not going to bleed all over the internet. I'm not emo.

Okay, I'll beg: please buy Honor At Stake

You know? I think everything is going well. Maybe. Probably. Honest.

Okay, I have no clue.

Good news...

So, I've got 22 reviews on Amazon (21 of the same on Goodreads). And, really, everybody loves me.

No, really, everybody loves Honor At Stake.

I've even had people who've bought the book as gifts. I'm shocked.

No, really, I'm shocked.

Remember that meme I've been using since Honor At Stake came out? Where did I put it?

Oh, yeah, this one.

I mean it. I really do.

Apparently, at this minute, Amazon has only ten copies left of Honor At Stake.  So, that has to be great, right?

ON THE OTHER HAND....

Music to Write to: Pirates (Taylor Davis)

I heard Peter Hollens do this one, and he didn't really do enough of the main theme for my taste.  This is a good version of it without just going to the HHHAAANNNSSS Zimmer version.

Lucky for her, Lindsey Stirling never did this one.

May the stupid be with you -- Tor on Star Wars, Supergirl and Marvel

Tor, will you people stop being morons for five seconds? Please? That way I don't feel compelled to school your ass?

First, I saw the article on how "Supergirl is a metaphor for Being a Modern Woman," but you know what? I decided to not fisk it from orbit because it was just so stupid.

There's spin, and then there's using the stupid as an alternate energy source.

Especially when I got to the part of "In almost every scene, the Supergirl pilot is about a woman falling short of expectations, usually set by men." ... Except that the most belitting she gets is from her female boss.  Sorry, you have failed this review, this article, and, well, life. Thanks.

But hey, Supergirl is fighting men. And nothing can be good because men exist. And ... tell me how Tor isn't misandrist?

Second, I saw an article literally entitled "Is Marvel Shying Away From A Black Widow Movie Because They Know They’ll Never Get It Right?"  Which is funny because I just saw that Marvel announced a Black Widow movie within the last three months. So congratulations, Tor, you done f**ked it up.  A lot. Again, yet still, already.

Uh huh ... yeah, the entire thing boiled down to the Black Widow "controversy" a few months ago. In short: They're just fretting that Black Widow won't be a feminist movie, because they think their own narratives are the only ones that should be told.

And then, I read through their article asking if Star Wars fans should forgive The Phantom Menace, and if we should.

You know what? That's the point where I realized that Tor is a worthless piece of crap.

Follow this logic, if you can.  The article on Phantom Menace states that at least an hour should be cut from the movie. An hour. After cutting that, you get a tv episode. Maybe less.

And, after going through everything wrong with The Phantom Menace, the article cites a few things that were good about the movie .... and that's it. The article then uses those few breadcrumbs as proof that Star Wars fans should get over ourselves, and seems a little offended that we haven't all ready.

In fact, there is as least one section of the article that states that, well, The Phantom Menace is canon now, and if you don't like it, you can't really be a fan of Star Wars, now can you?

Welcome to hipster-fascism, ladies and gentlemen.

TONIGHT ON THE CATHOLIC GEEK: I won't be there

Yup. That's right.  After 22 Episodes, I am going to take this Sunday off.

After last week's schedule SNAFU that left me on the air by myself for the better part of the first hour, and the fact that I have no guest this Sunday?  

Yeah, I think it's best that I take off this round.

However, we've got a treat tonight, we've got the Novel Ninja, Matthew Bowman, showing up as the guest host for the evening.

You may know Matt Bowman from his personal website. You may even know him from his job as an editor.  You might, at the end of the day, know him from an entry of Sad Puppies Bite Back.

Tonight, he has the head of the local Royal Manticorian Navy, and a priest to discuss the synod, hence the title: Synods and Starships

The Catholic Geek: Synods and Starships 11/08 by We Built That Network | Culture Podcasts

Terror is also a form of Communication

So when I was going through older posts to repost, I came across this one -- Terror is Also a Form of Communication.

The problem is as I read it, it wasn't actually that interesting. Maybe it's because I'm now at a point in my life where I'm doing nothing by marketing, writing blogs, and writing books -- and the blogs ARE the promotions, etc, etc, et al.

However, I had a theme going, and it just stopped.

So, with your permission, let's start this conversation again...

* * * *

During The Pius Trilogy, and during Honor At Stake, I've had characters who are a little vague. And no, I don't mean mysterious. The most vague characters in both are the most blunt, and the most straightforward, and the person who's seemingly the most willing to tell you exactly what's on his mind.

In Honor, Marco Catalano will tell you exactly what he's thinking if you ask him. Just have to ask. Granted, he won't volunteer what he's thinking, you have to ask, but he'll answer. He is rarely evasive, but even when he is, he can be honest while he's lying. Because truth makes for the best lies.

For Pius, Sean A.P. Ryan is the other end of that spectrum.  mercenary,self-described cleanser of the gene pool, and he lists his resume in terms of property damage and body counts.

Both of these characters are a little intense. Neither have to be evil, despite destruction, chaos and / or death. Heck, just look at comic book characters like Wolverine who slash hordes to pieces all the time, and his kill count is probably somewhere in the thousands by now ... assuming he doesn't get rebooted into being a hippy... And then there's Deadpool ...

But I digress.

The Return of Everything

One, yes, I'm back. My guest has left for parts unknown (Iowa is greatly unknown to me) and I am now free and clear to right blogs again. The first thing I did was go over to the Catholic Geeks and pump out some articles, because I like to fulfill my obligations.

And, after finishing those news articles, I have to ask ... What is wrong with everyone lately?  Why is everyone and everything dedicated to reboots?

Okay, in some cases, I understand it. If it's a comic book something, fine, yay.  But why are people bothering bringing back crap that no one liked in the first place?

For example, Star Trek.  I understand bringing back Star Trek, because it's a force to be reckoned with, a franchise that's on the rebound.  So I understand having the return of Star Trek to the small screen.  Granted, in this case, it's smaller than usual, because it's "coming back" to computer streaming services, not to network or cable television. And, since the films are doing so well, it only stands to reason that Star Trek would take another stab at TV.

Star Trek has a fan base. It has some really die hard fans. These fans will cut you if you point out how DS9 ripped off Babylon 5. Star Trek is a franchise monster that's on the rebound.

THAT I understand.

But Van Helsing?  Remember that terrible Hugh Jackman film in 2004?  It's coming back, only to the Syfy channel and gender-swapped. And apparently with nothing to do with the original movie. None of the original people behind the film seem to be working on it, none of the cast are released, and it's being brought to us by the channel behind Sharknado.

Who thought this was a good idea? No one liked the original film, it died a horrible death at the box office, and it's so old, no one currently going to college probably even remembers it.  Honestly, it was 2004.  Do you remember that year very well?  It was the year after Lord of the Rings had finished, leaving Harry Potter to continue on inertia. Van Helsing was just a bad film.  And even worse, they've made it Vanessa Helsing -- unless it's Vanessa van Helsing, that means even THE NAME OF THE SHOW IS WRONG.  And if they make her nickname "Van," I'm going to throw rocks at the tv screen. That's such a stupid nickname, no one would swallow it.

Yes, I'm only pissed at the gender-swapping because they've managed to screw up the name in that route.

Music blog: World of Warcraft (Peter Hollens)

How can you not write epic fight scenes and end of the world scenarios written to this music?

After all, this is Warcraft.

Call back blog -- Don't Panic: a writer's guide to disaster

So, this one was originally posted in 2011

As I'm still playing tour guide through tomorrow, I shouldn't have too much in the way of new material. Heck, I barely got the radio show up and running.  That's a funny story for another time.

Anyway, enjoy.  I should be back on Wednesday. I hope.

* * * *

I should start by mentioning that this is going to be less about writing disasters, and more about a character reacting to them.

My characters have all sorts of problems.

In my books, I've had people confronted with Being beaten to death, Destruction of public property, heartbreak, a small war, as well as vampires and the end of the world.

In most cases, this is easy for writers to put down. Fear is easy, everyone has experienced it in one way or another.

In my case, not so much.

There are two moments in my life that highlight the reasons my characters react the way they do.

One New Year's eve, I was over at a friend's house.  My sister decided to be helpful in the kitchen, and went to work cutting vegetables with a mandolin slicer.

Somehow, my sister managed to cut off the pad of her little finger.

The husband of the house couldn't look at the sight of blood. The wife felt immediately ill. My sister felt faint from blood loss almost instantly.

I rolled my eyes, sighed, made sure that the severed part clicked into place with the rest of the meat puzzle of my sister's finger, wrapped it, and drove her to the nearest ER.  We were seen immediately, since it was only 6pm on New Year's eve.  Midnight would have been a different kettle of fish, I'm sure.

I didn't freak out before, during, of after the incident. I was mostly annoyed that the evening might be shot to hell.  I went out into the parking lot with my cell phone and started calling people to wish them all a happy new year.  It took about 90 minutes for my sister's nine stitches to put her back together again. And a fun time was had by all.

And this isn't gloating. This isn't "I kept my head while others lost theirs!" moment. This was a moment of irritation, annoyance, and "Damnit, I have to play ambulance driver? Really?"

Now, you could say this happened to someone else. so why should I worry.

Then there was the time I was accused of being a terrorist....