TV Review: 2017 Season Finale

Several of the shows I'm going to list I haven't done a review of yet, so bear with me.

For example? I have not reviewed...

24: Legacy: It's ... okay. The basic setup hasn't changed. In this particular case, we have an Army Ranger who took out not-Osama knockoff #6. He and his Rangers are being hunted by not-Osama's son. The son is also looking for a list of sleeper cells they want to activate, and one of the Rangers have stolen. Miranda Otto plays a former CTU head who planned the mission. She's married to a Presidential candidate. Hilarious ensues. Our lead is married, and sends his wife to the protection of his brother, the gang leader, so that's another subplot.

Part of the problem with the show was our lead. Yes, they had traded Kiefer Sutherland for a younger black actor, but the problem isn't that he's young, black, or just not Kiefer. That isn't the problem-- it's that everybody was more interesting. Miranda Otto was interesting, her husband, played by Jimmy Smits (whose father was Gerald MacRanie, go figure) were interesting. Our lead's gangsta brother is more charismatic than he was. I also liked gangstas versus jihadis, that was fun. And we had Oded Fehr (The Mummy, The Mummy Returns) once again playing Middle Eastern.  It was all right. And it's renewed. We'll see how far nostalgia can take them. 7/10

Taken: Yes, this is supposed to be a prequel to the films, only they're really not trying that hard for accuracy. There is only one person who looks like he could turn into a character we saw in the films.

On the one hand, I like the cast. Jennifer Beals needs a career, and she's fun.. One or two characters from The Unit make a return in basically the same roles. And yes, I can see their lead growing up to be Liam Neeson.

Though the pace is incredibly different from the films, ponderous, and very slow some times. Though I must admit, Vince Flynn would be happy with the dead politician count. And it's supposed to be under a Hillary Clinton administration (the President is referred to as "she"), so the depth of the political corruption is hilarious, and I don't think they meant it to be so.

6/10, with room to grow.

iZombie: I originally tripped over this show on NetFlix, tried the first episode, and ended up binging the first season in on go. Then season 2. I was a little worried about Season 3. Would it hold up on a week to week format? Apparently.  The Premise of the series is simple: Zombies are only mindless killers under certain conditions -- but if they get their brains quickly enough, they can pass for albino humans. Olivia "Liv" Moore (yes, breath in the pun) works at a morgue, so she can get her brains. Her boss, Ravi, used to work at the CDC, caught on to her condition, and started thinking "cure." At the end of season 2, we were introduced to a PMC that is filled with zombies, and I thought "oh, come on, are these the bad guys in season 3? This is going to be cliche and sucky."  No.  It isn't. No, they didn't. They took the premise and went a direction I didn't even think of. It's awesome, really. It is funny as all yell, and smart. You might even say that have a really, really nice set .... of brains.

YYYYEEEEAAAAHHHHH

Go, watch it.

10/10... Yes. Really. There hasn't been a sucky episode yet. And it's still broadcasting.

The Arrowverse.


Sigh. I'm done with The Flash, Supergirl, probably done with Legends of the Idiots. Arrow is the only one that's tolerable lately.

The problem is still that the season-long plot is overshadowing the villain of the week, and I liked the villain du jour method of handling problems. I remember when they used to be able to do both at once.

• The Flash: They lost my interest early on this season. They opened with the "Flashpoint" alternate timeline, and made the start of the season so disorienting that people I watched it with were confused and turned off. Then it went totally downhill, becoming melodrama, and completely rejecting any and all sense of plot and story for the sake of whining. Then there's a vision of the future where Iris is murdered, and everyone's attention is focused on saving her.... it might have been nice if I cared about the character. Iris died in the comics, time for her to die in the show, too. Barry will get over it. 4/10
• Legends of Tomorrow: Due to schedule conflicts, Arthur Darville, Captain Hunter, left for the first half of the season. This put Sarah Lance in charge of the ship. And I don't think I cared when she seduced a French queen while her colleagues were being shot at -- oh, wait, I really do. They plain old pissed me off when they put Guinevere in plate armor AND had her making out with Sarah. And their Union versus Zombies episode? Don't even get me started on that BS. Right now, I'd be more interested in a Captain Cold and Heat Wave TV show, except they already have that on Fox, and it's called Prison Break. 4/10
• Supergirl: Agit-prop dumpster fire where they care less for plot and character than any of the shows above, and that is an extremely difficult challenge. 1/10
• Arrow: Aside from some editing, and needing a shorter season, season 5 was fairly solid. And the return of Manu Bennett was nice to see. I only hope that means he can come back to the show on a regular basis now. But they lose an entire point for attempting to do a gun control episode, and doing it poorly; it was message fiction that barely had a coherent message. Also, for their torture Oliver episode. 7/10

MacGyver: I watch for the Murdoc episodes. That actor chews scenery in an entertaining fashion. It's fun to watch. And while it's gotten better than the first episodes, it's still mediocre. 5/10

NCIS: This was a strange season, and I think it took have the season for them to get their bearings. The cast seems tired of showing up, and Gibbs has less and less screentime. I'm waiting for them to have Gibbs die, set MacGee up as team leader, and we can close the book on this show before it turns into original CSI on us. Because right now, the minute that actors David MacCallum, Paulie Perrette, or Sean Murray die, or decide to leave the show, the producers had better hit the panic button, because I will stop watching soon after. 6-/10, depending on the episode.

NCIS: Los Angeles -- I say this every time, but someone has to stop pretending that LL Cool J and Chris O'Donnell are interesting. I watch for .... pretty much everyone else, really. There is some fun character byplay that, at times, reminds me of Homicide: Life on the Streets. 7/10

NCIS: New Orleans -- This was a very strange season. I'm not even sure if I liked where they ended up. At least they remembered to have New Oreleans in their New Orleans show.  6/10.

Scorpion: I like the pacing. I like the characters, who have turned into entertaining people instead of the cardboard caricatures from the first episode. But good Lord, someone tell them to stop pretending to have something like science. The space rocket episode? No. Just no. Mileage may vary. 6-8/10

Hawaii 5-0: It's okay. Nothing really stood out about this season. Though I'm getting tired of the old married couple bickering of our main characters. You'd think they'd tone it down after a while. 6/10

Blue Bloods: Solid series. Generally sane. They usually deal with topics as apolitically as possible. But there were still a few elements of pure stupid in there. They avoided some of the SJW scripts this season, I don't know how, but they did. Congrats, guys.  9/10.

Criminal Minds: AAARRRRGGGGHHHH. If anyone does a repeat of this season, I'm done. While the season-long story arc had a satisfactory conclusion, good God, it was painful to watch .... I'm sorry, not watch, fast forward through. "Spencer in jail" was a waste of time, generally not interesting, and I was able to pick up on what was happening while I sped through the Shawshank sequences.  6/10, and don't do that again.

Bull: Eh. I generally like the series.  It's mostly a 6/10, though the last few episodes were closer to 8/10 -- mostly due to the introduction of Eliza Dushku, a character who could talk at least as good a game as Michael Weatherly. If we keep her for season 2, I'll probably even watch.

Lucifer: With the introduction of Tricia Helfer as Lucifer's mother, a goddess, they lost any pretense of this being the Judeo-Christian Devil, and basically turned the show into a straight-up urban fantasy. I guess that could be seen as an improvement, so they're obviously tossing out any standard mythology around Lucifer. Also, since there is no reference to Jesus as a historical event within the universe, it pretty much makes this more Zoroastrian than Judeo-Christian. Turn your brain off, enjoy the insanity. It's a comedy police procedural ... almost like Castle. Only more insane. 8/10

Elementary: It was okay. The season finale subplot was out of left field, and jarring, and I'm not sure I was a fan of the primary arch. Tolerable, and generally entertaining. 7/10.

The Blacklist: The second half of the season had nothing to do with the first half, and that's a positive. The war with "Mister Kaplan" was an interesting battle, and there's a glimmer of an explanation behind everything going on. But I think they have only one more season left to them. They've broken up the story into half-seasons, and it's getting a little tedious. Finish it, or ratings finish you, Blacklist. 7/10-- points deducted for the first half of the season sucking so much.

Lethal Weapon:  Still the best series of the season. 10/10. If you haven't watched, you're missing out. It has heart, humor, character development, and a great balanced between solo episodes and overall season plot. I miss this series, and next season needs more episodes. Watch it, and throw out the Mel Gibson films.

The Dragon Awards are open and ready for nominations, and I have a list of suggestions you might want to take a look at. If you already  have a good idea of what you want, just click here to go and vote for them. The instructions are right there.

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The Love at First Bite series. 

    

Miseason Review: Legends of Tomorrow, and Invasion!

This one may be shorter than I thought.

On the one hand, this show has improved since last season. Last season, the writing was so uneven, some episodes were great, and some felt like they were a failed writing class.

This season needed more focus. They've wandered all over the place, and they needed more direction with where they were going.

Also, there is a slight problem with the lack of Captain Hunter this year. I understand it's because actor Arthur Darville is busy elsewhere. But really, we needed a steadier hand at the helm sooner. Sarah Lance as Captain is awesome, but the crew needs work.

I was also disappointed that Stargirl happened, then the Shade happened on the Flash. Both were elements of James Robinson's Starman run, and I think they shut the door on that ever happening.

Anyway, I'll be sticking with this show, mostly because their midseason finale revealed that, yes, they do know where they're going, and have finally hinted at the plans of the villains. Also, they keep having cameos by Snart, and promise to bring him back.

Right now, their strength this season is by reusing bad guys, and in a way that makes it reasonable to bring them back. Granted, the time travel bit is getting a little confusing (Wait, you killed a guy because you're going to fight in constantly in his future ... but if you kill him now, why should he ever run into you ever again? Huh? WATCH SOME DOCTOR WHO.)

The best part of this series, and perhaps any of the Berlantiverse this year, has been the massive four-way crossover.

Yes, I'll review that now. Because why not?

The Supergirl part was the weakest of them all, for several reasons: one, it's Supergirl. Two, you could have skipped it and just gone to The Flash.

... But that was a massive misstep. That episode of Supergirl had a bioweapon that could target and destroy any alien that wasn't from Krypton. The smart move would have been to bring that back to the main Arrowverse and just kill the aliens. But they didn't. And thus the episode was as irrelevant as the show is. Maybe they figured there was no overlap between the Supergirl and The Flash audience.

The Flash episode ... could have been better. They came up with a contrived way to make everyone pissed off at Barry. Granted, the scenes between Oliver and Barry that produced was fun, but that's it. They went through a lot of contrived loops to make it so that Barry and Oliver were isolated, so they could do an -- admittedly awesome -- hero v hero sequence.

The Arrow episode was a good 100th .... just didn't really do much for the story arc

And their episode for Legends was pretty darn good.

But 2.5 good episodes out of 4? Not a good batting average.

Anyway, if you liked what you read and want to click on a book, try one of the below

And if you've read these, a review would be nice. Thanks.

 

Midseason Berlantiverse Review: Arrow

Arrow is, by and large, the best of DC CW TV.

iZombie doesn't count, that's from Vertigo.

When our season opens, Oliver Queen must put together a team of heroes, since he lost his last one to retirement. They include Mad Dog (a recent classic character), and Mister Terrific (a REALLY classic characters), Artemis (a recent favorite from Young Justice et al), and eventually Ragman (also classic).

....For inexplicable reasons, Mad Dog has become Hispanic and Mr. Terrific is gay and black -- and neither impact the plot or the writing, which is both a blessing and frustration. It's a blessing in that they aren't harping on identity politics; it's frustrating in that they changed the characters just to check box that they have characters who are gay, black, and Hispanic. It's just head scratching, but I guess it's generally inoffensive. It's just odd.

Our season-long killer this year is Prometheus, a DC villain who, in the comics, mimics the fighting style of anyone he chooses. Sort of the DC version of Taskmaster, only the DC version needs a magic helmet. (Spear and Magic Helmet? Heh. Magic Helmet....).  But the CW Prometheus is more of a mystery. Does he have this helmet? Not that I can tell. Can he mimic anyone? No clue. The only thing I know about him is that he sounds a lot like Michael Dorn. Which is interesting, because by Christmas, we've usually been introduced by the primary villain of the season. It's an interesting break in pattern.

Overall, I like what they're doing. The plot switches back and forth from the overarching storyline, to the villain of the week. It's nice and evenly paced.

I even like the flashbacks, mostly because we're off that freaking island already. God did I hate that island. By season three and four, I started hating the flashbacks, but I think the writers started to do the same -- they cut back on the flashbacks a lot in those seasons. Right now, I'm good with them.

It's nowhere near as dark and depressing as the last two seasons. And I'm happy with it.

My major problem with this season is ... they're still doing flashbacks.

Right now, they've cut down a lot on the angsty crap. If a problem is uncovered in one episode, it's usually resolved within one episode.  For the most part, their days of constantly harping on a lie, or a misunderstanding, or something else, seems to be long gone.

For example

SPOILER ALERT. SPOILER ALERT

The Christmas episode concluded with Prometheus setting up Green Arrow into killing a cop, mostly by dressing him up like Prometheus. The cop happens to be Felicity's boyfriend. She doesn't go after Oliver, or attack him, verbally or otherwise. She has a reasonable reaction. She just cries.

END SPOILER.

So, yeah. I'll take it.

If you haven't already, check out some of the books below.

 

Midseason Review: Supergirl

The first half of the season is done. Time to break them down.

Item the First

It's a puff piece, it's agit-prop, no, it's Supergirl!

Dear, God, SOMEBODY SAVE THIS SHOW.

Sigh. Too late.

Okay, fine, let's break this down.

The Good: The move for the CW has definitely improved the series. In the first few episodes, you can see the budget actually show up on the screen.

 I guess that means that the filming on location in LA really did eat up most of the budget while they were on CBS.


There is obvious effort put in here and there. The end result of the villain Parasite, for example, wasn't that bad. I say the end result because he was really a global warming fanatic who went insane.

They had one or two obvious character choices for certain players that they did not take that surprised me -- mostly, their decision to not make every member of the Luthor family into a flaming psychopath.

And, to be honest, I don't mind their Superman. I mean, heck, he SMILES. Was a Superman allowed to smile since Christopher Reeves? Hell, Brandon Routh was so dang stiff, he should have been an awesome Superman. He wasn't even allowed to smile until he became Ray Palmer, and now, he makes a great Clark Kent on Legends of Tomorrow ... as the wrong character.

The Bad: everything else.

No, really. This is bad. The opening of the season wasn't that bad. It had Kara and Clark, and it wasn't that bad ... okay, the Cat Grant lusting after a man who is obviously 15-20 years younger than herself was amazingly creepy, and everyone else just looked uncomfortable without calling her on it.

The primary thread for the season revolves around "anti-alien sentiment" and a "home-grown terrorist group, Cadmus." I mean, I can't imagine why anyone would have harsh feelings against aliens. I mean, they nearly DESTROYED THE PLANET last season. Though they actually have some counterpoint to this thinly-veiled political analogue, with even the Martian Manhunter directly opposing an "alien amnesty" proposed by a President Lynda Carter. So they have some props there.

And, seriously, "amnesty"? I'm sorry, in a world where Superman has official citizenship of the United States, are they telling me there's no way for these people to just fill out some paperwork? Is INS / ICE really still screwed up, even in the DCU? Are we kidding?

And we won't even get into the blunt forced message fiction about Kara's sister becoming a lesbian out of ... nowhere, really. Yes, the character of Officer Leslie Thompson from the Superman comic was gay ... then again, so was Rene Montoya, Cassandra Kane, and about half the women in the DC universe feel like they're at least bi, if not 100% lesbian. But they've spent so much time with the sister becoming gay, and less and less time addressing an overall plot. I fast forward through at least a third of every episode, looking for a plot. Kickass female characters ... and they made them gay. Yes, of course. Because "kickass" somehow must mean ... what? Butch? Therefore gay? Um, no, people. That's not how this works.

The sister's sudden coming out of the closet is particularly startling after first season and her having a relationship with Maxwell Lord -- who was so overbearing and overshadowing last season, his disappearance this season is whiplash-inducing.

Oh, and then there's Jimmy Olsen becoming the Guardian .... Do I even have to explain why this is a bad idea? Jimmy Olsen ... as a superhero.  Somehow, Jimmy Olsen is a cross between Iron Man and Batman. Look at him. He's even IN IRON MAN'S SUPERHERO POSE.

Even Kara mentions how her cousin sometimes works with a guy with a lot of gadgets and a lot of issues -- ie, Batman.

Oh, does this mean I can have Batman now? Please? Pretty please?

But, yeah, Jimmy Olsen as a superhero ... because the son of the Toyman made him a suit. Um, point of order, but did Wynn cobble together this super suit out of DEO technology? Did no one notice what had to be millions of dollars in hardware suddenly going missing? Is it as inefficiently run as every other government organization that millions can just disappear without anyone noticing? And screw that, now we just have the problem that Tony Stark has -- why is Wynn not making Guardian suits fro everyone in the DEO? Considering the amount of crap that they have to put up with on a daily basis, why hasn't Wynn made an entire SWAT team suits like this?

Worst of all ... why is JIMMY OLSEN having more time on screen as a superhero THAN SUPERGIRL. You know, in a series called SUPERGIRL?

Yes, I do consider it possible that Supergirl could recover. There was hint that Lynda Carter's President was an alien, suggesting that she be an alien menace, and that all of this illegal immigration analogy falls apart. But I don't see it happening, I truly don't.

And the sad thing is that this is all so easily fixable. I honestly don't care about Kara's sister and her new girlfriend -- that the sister has become gay, or that she has a girlfriend -- if they focused less on that and more on THE PLOT, I'll be happy.

In fact, you will find that complaint very often in the Berlantiverse reviews.  I want less focus on interpersonal relationships, and more of a plot. The sad thing is, for Supergirl, this is still an improvement over last season.

I may keep watching, if I have additional brain cells I feel like sacrificing. Otherwise, this is one hero I can without.

And, I can say without any shame at all, you're better off reading any of the following books.

 

Casting Codename UnSub

So, I've done multiple posts on how I would cast my novel, A Pius Man: A Holy Thriller if it were made into a film. If you want to take a look, there's a 2011, 2012 and 2013 edition.

While I think about it, please remember

However, there's been an oversight, and I have never looked at casting the novel Codename: Winterborn, or Codename: UnSub which I co-wrote with Allan Yoskowitz.

Remember this one?

From a casting perspective, this is easy: fewer characters, for one.

What would the casting look like for Codename: UnSub?

Kevin Anderson.

If you don't know the story (and seriously, you really should read it), Kevin is the spy that has a little problem .... namely, his entire team has been wiped out, his wife has been murdered, and politicians in his own government would like to see him deader than Jacob Marley on ice.

After his initial run in with the Islamic Republic of France (long, long story), Kevin is ... a little broken.  How broken is he? Let's say that he came close to mass murder in this book.  Think I'm exaggerating? Is ten million people enough "mass" in "mass murder"?

You also need someone who is considered "handsome"-ish, and can do a lot of hand-to-hand combat, has a dry, offbeat sense of humor, and can occasionally look at his own insane moments, and acknowledge that, yes, he really has lost his marbles, along with his friends, his family and almost anyone he ever knew.

Which leads to the flavor of the month ... no, I don't mean Benedict Cumberbach, though he does seem to be everywhere.  Cumberbach is a great actor, don't get me wrong, and he is able to kick ass and take names, but he's actually getting a little up there. He's already forty, and I'm shooting for at least a little younger.

I actually mean Stephen Amell, the star of Arrow. From seasons 1-5, he's going through a range of disturbed and insane, Look at the first episode of Arrow once more, he can do PTSD variant, and we want some of that. By season 5, we get witty banter, comedy, and he's actually acting like a human being.

As for the hand-to-hand combat ... his exercise routines were half the commercials for the show.

Oh, and Kevin also has a entire thing with bows and arrows.  Yes, it's "a thing."  It's a very long story.

Yes, there are a lots of long stories involved in this novel.  Please, read the novel, so I can stop saying "it's a long story." :)

There are, of course, other options.

The first one is Stephen Amell...

Yes, another Amell.

There was a time when the Amell cousins were going to take over CW.

Sadly, I have to tell you, I don't know how well he can act. I've seen him on The Flash, mostly, and he wasn't allowed that much in the way of an acting range. I'm told he's had a few other CW shows (two, at least, I think) but I haven't seen either, and I really don't have much interest in them. So this might be a bit of a nonstarter.

But then again, think about it: bad ass ... a little broken... does this sound familiar?

How about: Winter is coming.

And by that, I mean Sebastian Stan, the Winter Soldier.

What, did you think I would suggest anything by George RR Martin?

Frankly, I'll take Stan.

Speaking of cold...

Kyle Elsen

Kyle is an assassin, a nerd who kills people.  You know, the sort of flake who can get lost in his own head while thinking about some new methodology to apply to his job ... only it involves murder?

Kyle's primary characteristic is that he's, well, a little cool. In Codename: Winterborn, he doesn't have too much of a personality, but he makes up for that in UnSub. We get hints to his back story here. As a character, Kyle doesn't have issues so much as he has the leather bound collected volumes. There's a character arc that plays out, and gives Kyle depth beyond knowing a hundred ways to kill someone with a spoon.

But at the end of the day, his outward appearance is he's very, very ....cold.

Enter Wentworth Miller

Come on, even his photograph looks snarky. Does he even need to say anything?

And, let's take a look at that face for a moment. Don't tell me he doesn't look like a serial killer in the making.

My friend Carleigh
The model for Mandy in the
Antagonize me "interview."

Mandy.

Okay, Mandy is my favorite character, she really is. She is cute, kinda sexy, she enjoys her job, and, damn it, she's just fun to write. She's a mercenary, and her job in this novel is to hunt down and kill everyone's favorite nutbar, Kevin Anderson. She's morally ambiguous, with a sense of morality that crops up at some strange times. Well, strange for her.

Mandy doesn't need a lot of choreography, since most of her fights are gun battles, but we at least need someone who's lithe, athletic, something like that.

Also, a slightly more important part of her character involved her size, she's not particularly tall: 5'6" would be good. She's a blue-eyed brunette who's half smart-ass, half kick-ass, and really would like to be amoral when she grows up. She puts her best effort into it, honest.

Originally, when I designed Mandy, I loosely based her off of a 24 villain of the same name, played by Mia Kirshner. However, Kirshner is getting a little old for this sort of thing -- Mandy is in her 20s, and, well, I don't actually like Kirshner (in every one of her interviews she comes off as ignorant, but very, very certain of everything. And stiff. And shallow, and .... gah). Most importantly, I don't think she's capable of acting her way out of a paper bag.  Seriously, in 24, she doesn't exactly have much of a sense of humor or emotional range.

Why would I base a character off of someone like that? I wanted an unrelenting, unrepentant antagonist who would stop at almost nothing to hunt Kevin Anderson down like a dog, including gunning him down in a playground filled with children...

Obviously, when I started writing Mandy in the novel, she turned into something else on me.  So, who would we be getting?

We need to have someone who can deliver a line like this, from UnSub,

Bad guy: “What do you want?”“I'd say world peace, but that would be a lie. I'd be out of a job otherwise.” She gave him a little smile that creeped him out a bit. “How about the names of everyone you work with, now and forever? How about everyone up and down the supply chain? And a pony?”

Also, we need someone who can either hold a gun or fight, and act.

I think I know someone like that.

Getting warmer? Summer is coming.

Summer Glau.

She's got the general coloring down, and she's the right build. We know she can fight her little heart out, and she still looks like a kid. And she's a much better actress than anyone's really let her be. She's got my vote.

There's also Beth Riesgraf.

Yes, that's her as a brunette. On the one hand, she's too tall, on the other hand .... go watch Leverage. She can act, dang it.


Major Antonio Rohaz

This is Mandy's boss, the CEO of the Mercenary's Guild. He's described as having a dancer's posture, stiff and militaristic, with a sharp nose, and green eyes.  No, he doesn't look specifically Hispanic, but I grew up with a friend named Martinez (which she pronounced Martin-ez, not Mar-teen-ez) and who is whiter than I am, with green eyes, and light brown hair.

Believe it or not, I based the character design, very loosely, on Basil Rathbone in the original The Mark of Zorro. This included the clipped delivery of the words, the baring, and everything short of him actually pulling out a sword in the middle of the book.  His importance grows throughout the series, You could say that he's a minor character, but he's going to make an appearance throughout the series, and leave major impacts along the way ... some of them in people's heads, but that's neither here nor there.

Yes, I know. After that sort of buildup, who could you possibly get who could top this.  It's Basil Rathbone. He's Sherlock Holmes. He's an Olympic-level fencing master.  He was the archetypal villain in anything involving a sword for nearly forty years of Hollywood history.  How do you top that?

You get a god.

Yes, I went there.

Look at the original character description, and tell me it doesn't sound familiar: pale skin, green eyes, sharp nose, black hair.  You know this person, don't you?

Yup, it's Tom "Loki" Hiddleston, one of the other flavors of the week for the past few years.  Seriously, if we modify that photo (taken at ComicCon, San Diego,) and make it a military uniform, he's got the look. Also, Hiddleston is a Shakespearean actor who wore his Loki costume, in public, and kept a straight face. He can do whatever he likes.

Allan and his wife have floated one or two other names, like David Zayas (the Generalissimo in The Expendables). or Carlos Bernard, of 24.

However, there is another person that I want to keep in mind.

Giancarlo Esposito

I know what you're thinking. He's too dark for the person I've described. However, he can pull off the mustache, his features are close enough to what I'm thinking of ... obviously, we need to work on the hair, I'm not sure the haircut in that photo is not military regulation.

Also, I remember that Esposito has done a few jobs in military uniform. I just can't seem to find it right now. Yeah, sorry.

Moving right along...

The next four characters are sort of interlinked.  They're all in the town of San Francisco, they're all computer nerds, though all very different people.  We've got the shy, the sarcastic, the joker, and the damn near sociopathic.

Lotus

This is an Allan character design.  Lotus is one of a set of hacker Triplets.  For Lotus, he wanted someone short, blonde, and utterly, breathtakingly beautiful as a computer genius, probably the best computer hacker and programmer in the entire city, and maybe the planet Earth.

Believe it or not, I go someone already picked out. It was easy.

Look to the left. This is Emily Bett Rickards. She's not bad looking, huh?

But, nah, she can't do computer jargon, right?  It's Hollywierd, the hot babes can't possibly also do smart at the same time. Maybe some ass-kicking, but brains? Don't kid me.

Oh, wait.

That's right, Madam Rickards is the brains behind the operation of Arrow, playing a computer programmer.

Funny enough, when I suggested Rickards to Allan, before I wrote this blog, I did start with the first photo, and I had an interesting reaction.  Said reaction being "Oh my God!"

And that was before I suggested Loki as Rohaz.

The name Bonnie Wright has also been floated. She's Ginny Weasley at the Harry Potter Franchise.


Mickie.

Mickie, Lotus' sister, could technically be played also by Emily Rickards or Bonnie Wright, they are triplets after all. Yes, there is a fraternal twin involved here, but having identical twins and a fraternal are not impossible.

For the record, Mickie is sociable, sarcastic, and has no problem constantly smacking her brother (to be discussed below), who really deserves it (no, seriously, he deserves it). Her special features include drugging people for information, dealing with unruly costumers in their bar, and has utterly insane hair -- usually bright red hair.  She's also a computer hacker, though not as much of a genius as Lotus.

So, smart, probably good looking (to be related to Lotus, you'd sort of expect her to be), sarcastic, and looks good with red hair.

I guess we can have Rickards play both parts. Lord knows she does sarcastic well enough on Arrow, but if we want someone different, I'm seeing Emma Stone.  Yes, Emma Stone. Let's face it, she already is a redhead, she can handle smart in both Amazing Spider-Man and Easy A (didn't like the film, but liked her), and with facial expressions like that (look right) she can pull this off without a problem.

Mac

Yes, you might have caught a theme in these triplets, we have three hackers running a bar, a mixologist named Mickie, a hacker named Lotus and a primary bartender named Mac... Okay, there are some moments of this particular world that are about as subtle as a heart attack.

Then again, we're still more subtle than every other dystopia written for the last ten --  twenty -- thirty...

Okay, I can't really think of a dystopia that's subtle, but I'm sure one will come to me five minutes after I've posted this article.


Anyway, Mac, the last of our information brokers, who is average, blonde, and kind of annoying. "Oh, look at how many bad puns I can tell and pretend they're funny."  I may have been writing this blog post for too long already, but God, this character can get annoying. I'm glad he's not on screen that often.  I think I'm going to invest some character development for him in the next book. Either that, or invest some bullets into blowing his brains out. Either way, I'm good.

While he's not a blond, it's been suggested that I try ... Rupert Grint.

If you don't know the name Grint, or anyone named Rupert ... seriously, who names their kid Rupert? .... he's Ron Weasley of the Harry Potter franchise.

I'm not sure how well he works. He might also be too tall for the role. Then again, everyone I can think of, I dislike.

Then again, for UnSub, I don't think he's that important.

Kaye Wellering

Kaye is an interesting character, mostly because of the things the reader doesn't know about her.  She heads the "Hacker's Union," which is based on Alcatraz, with a forward office in Chinatown. The Hackers run all the major utilities in the city, and can turn them on or off at will. Kaye herself even states that, even though the Hackers are centuries ahead of even the "real world," she still has ultimate power in the city that time forgot, and has no problem playing with the lives of day-to-day people as though everyone in the city were her own personal toys.  There's a reason that Kevin refers to her as the bitch-queen of San Francisco.

She also looks young. That's not because I'm on some sort of CW kick, where everyone has to be young and pretty, but because there's a backstory. Notice, I didn't say she is young, just looks it. It's an important part of who she is.  So, we need someone who at least appears younger than she is (say, early 20s) and play older. If she were male, I would say "Get David Tennant, since he can do 900 year old time lord," but we'll have to settle for someone else. And, while Sarah Michelle Gellar is looking pretty darn good a decade after Buffy went off the air, that may not hold up.

Another detail makes me think of an actress, actually. Kaye is a 5'2" redhead. While the height is incidental (Kaye has been described as wearing 4" heels), and redheads come in a bottle, about about Molly C. Quinn?  She's been playing 14 going on 400 on Castle since the show began..  There's no reason not to think that she can't do something similar in a Codename: Winterborn film.

Although it's going to be creepy with a "sexy" Molly Quinn. I now understand friends of mine who are disturbed by a sexy Michelle Trachtenberg, having first seen her as Harriet the Spy.

What's Kaye's job in this? Oh... that's a really long story.

Andreas Foreman
Foreman is ... tall, dark, and deeply disturbed. He is a bright, energetic, charismatic, and manages to make the world revolve around him. He has a million followers, more or less, called the Forsaken, and they are all willing to kill for him. In fact, like the mafia, you can't become one of them unless you've killed, though Kevin Anderson suspects that it is just a gross over estimation. After all, how do you keep track of such things?

He is also tall, skinny, with dark, piercing eyes, and goes from being soft spoken, to over the top and energetic.

Tall, skinny, charismatic, deranged, over the top....

Sound like anyone we know?

Yes, David Tennant.

However, for UnSub, he's not as important as the man who works for him.

Harris Derringer.
He's short, dark, and vicious. In the case I'm thinking of, Derringer is former SAS, and while Foreman is nuts, Derringer is just plain evil. He's the puppet master, while Foreman is the one who keeps the masses in line.

Short, dark, British and evil.

We can stereotype that one.

Sadly, Mark Sheppard will need a stunt double to pull off the capoeira moves I have him do in UnSub.

His part is simple: he's a suspect.

Anyway, I think that's more than enough for right now. there are one or two more characters I'd want to focus on after that, but right now, I'm cross-eyed, lucky if I can spell my own name, and I'm hoping I didn't write this blog in a language more closely resembling Norwegian than English.

You might want to try Codename: UnSub.

Superhero Fight Club 2.0

Watch the shiny special effects and the dancing. It makes about as much sense as the first one, but it's cute.

It makes even less sense when you consider that they're still keeping the Supergirl universe separate from the Arrowverse, but if you're interested in making sense, don't go into comic books.

Why Arrow is Better than Agents of SHIELD

FOR THE RECORD: THIS WAS ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE AMERICAN JOURNAL YEARS AGO. SINCE I KEEP REFERRING TO IT, I FIGURED I SHOULD REPOST IT HERE.

YES, I KNOW IT'S OUT OF DATE. SOMEDAY SOON, I MAY UPDATE IT. RIGHT NOW, IT'S JUST TOO FLIPPING LONG TO REBUILD THIS FROM THE GROUND UP. EVERYONE, ENJOY YOUR COLUMBUS DAY.

Arrow vs. Agents of SHIELD, Season 1 vs. Season 1.

Much hay has been made about Marvel's Show Agents of SHIELD. Mostly that it wasn't as good as it good have been. In order to highlight what went wrong, or to underline what the problem of many a fan has been, it makes sense to compare it to another comic book tv show that has been doing well, namely Arrow, based off of DC Comic's Green Arrow.

For reasons of fairness, I'm going to try and mirror these comparisons: pilot to pilot, season one to season one. Spoilers for Captain America: The Winter Soldier are included, as well as for the two shows.

Why does Arrow kick AoS's ass?

1. Comic references all over the place

Within the first five minutes of Arrow (perhaps the first minute), we see a mask with an arrow through one eye socket. For comic book readers, it was a quick squee! moment, hearkening back to the comic book Identity Crisis, where Oliver Queen jabbed an arrow into the empty eye socket of Deathstroke, professional mercenary -- the very same image that opened Arrow.

For the rest of the first episode, the comic book references kept coming. Queen's sister Thea, nicknamed Speedy, has a drug habit; in the comics, Queen's sidekick, named Speedy, also had a drug problem. Queen's ex-girlfriend is Laurel Dinah Lance -- Green Arrow's comic book girlfriend was Dinah Lance, aka the Black Canary.

In Arrow, the best friend was a Tommy Merlyn; in the comics, Merlyn was an adversary for Oliver Queen, and Malcom Merlyn would be the main villain later in the first season of Arrow.

For anyone who has ever looked at the comic books for an hour (I may have spent four minutes), it's clear that someone has paid attention. No, it's not fan service, fan service, fan service faithfulness to the comics – but there was enough to show that, yes, the writers are respecting the original material without being chained to it.

And then there's Marvel's Agents of SHIELD, with the forced references to the Marvel movie universe. Which is sort of strange, don't you think? Marvel has seemingly endless B- and C-list characters to draw on, and they used … no one.

Hydra barely even got a mention before Captain America: The Winter Soldier came out. Mariah Hill, a minor character, showed up for a few minutes in the pilot, then again within the final three episodes of the season. Sam Jackson showed up for a minute as Nick Fury ... After half a season goes by, the B-list comic character of Deathlok was shoehorned in. Oh, yeah, and Col. Talbot, a minor antagonist of the Hulk, shows up for a minute here and there by the end. When everything starts happening.

Which leads to...

2. Chekov's Machine Gun

The concept of Chekov's Gun is simple: Chekov's gun is that if you show a gun in act one, you have to fire it by act three; conversely, if you fire a gun in act three, you must show it in act one. You can't just have random things happen where they are never referred to or utilized again. It's called planning.


There was so obviously a plan with Arrow, it's not even funny. The primary villain of Season 1 showed up in episode 4, but we didn't know how or why until much later, with breadcrumbs scattered along the way. I'm not even going to go into the character arcs, personal development, and the time and energy they put in to allowing the growth of the supporting cast. I will, but not until later.

With Agents of SHIELD, we witness some of the laziest writing ever filmed and broadcast on television. When AoS first broadcast, they knew that Winter Soldier was going to bigfoot them like Godzilla on meth. Instead of building up anything, hinting at Hydra lurking in the shadows, hinting that there's an overall plan, there were endless filler episodes. Thus far, the only gun in sight was a literal gun from episode two. There was not a hint of Hydra outside of that lousy gun. When someone turned traitor, there were no hints that he was going to, no suggestions that could indicate it....they didn't even give him enough character to turn traitor. When he went bad, we didn't care.

Which leads to...


3. My original characters can beat up your original characters

Arrow, while having a wealth of comic book references and characters, also takes relatively minor, or nonexistent characters, and make them something special. Even minor or secondary characters have surprising depth. In Arrow, Felicity Smoak is the all-around tech genius of the group, and a fan favorite, while her comic book counterpart is barely mentioned (so minor she doesn't even warrant her own Wiki page), the stepmother of another superhero, Firestorm. John Diggle, the bodyguard and backup, never existed in the comic books, outside of being a reference to comic book author Andy Diggle; but on Arrow, he comes with a backstory, and character development. The same can be said for the "best friend," Tommy Merlyn. Each of these minor characters play an integral part in the show, and constantly add to it. Tommy goes from being a spoiled brat to a hero. Diggle goes from "just the bodyguard" to having his own episodes and subplots. Felicity is the comic relief, the tech guru, the research, the unrequited love interest, and occasionally the cavalry. These people do not merely exist to act as foils for the main character, they have lives of their own.

And then there's Agent of SHIELD, with cookie-cutter cliche characters. With the exception of a Marvel character from the cinematic universe, all of the main characters are "original." Agent Ward, tall, dark, and stoic, and otherwise lacking a personality (until he turns evil, then he's almost likable). And for counterpoint, there's Skye! She was your standard rebel without a clue, and always model-perfect (living in a van for years? Perfect hair and tan. Gut-shot and dying? Makeup is still perfectly applied).

The Fitz-Simmons mad scientist duo aren't even good as the "I'm so brilliant, I'm isolated" cliche they're going for. Real geniuses have real problems interacting with people -- as in "I'm sorry, did you ask me something five minutes ago? I was busy in my head." Albert Einstein had problems grasping the concept of body soap and shampoo, instead of just one soap. The WWII code-breaker Alan Turing was all but caged in a backroom during the war so he wouldn't wander off. Fitz-Simmons don't come off as geniuses, they come off like awkward high school kids.

Ming-Na's Melinda May was potentially interesting, then she started sleeping with Ward... who is 22 years her junior....just eww.

Speaking of characters...

4. DIVERSITY

No, not ethnic diversity, though that might help. I'm really thinking of diversity of appearance and style. While I don't really need ethnic diversity, at least differences in body types would be nice. On the Joss Whedon show Buffy, we had a redhead, a tall brunette with a microwave tan, a short blonde, a tall older British gentleman, and short pale and psychotic (played by Eliza Dushku). On AoS, even making one of the primary cast a blonde or a redhead would have helped for variety. Hell, I'd have even settled for brighter clothing that doesn't come from Hot Topic...

But would it kill them to have someone who isn't either American or from the UK? I'm a New Yorker, a monochromatic room makes me edgy. And SHIELD is supposed to be a world-wide membership organization, so why are only two countries involved here? For the last few episodes of season 1, they shoehorned in a young hip black fellow, in an obvious attempt to answer the critics who said that Agents of SHIELD was too white. The only reason that works thus far is because the character, Triplett, is a fun, charming, likable guy who has more personality than any two of the series regulars put together.

Then we look at Arrow. Everybody there has their own distinct looks and their own manner of speaking, even their own beliefs. The two old friends of our hero, Laurel and Tommy, were the standard "beautiful people" the CW usually has TV shows about, but one was black Irish the other a redhead (sort of) -- one thought our hero was a serial killer, the other thought he was a hero. Diggle is black, and former military, so he walks like a soldier, dresses in "security professional chic" or urban commando, and tries to bring Oliver away from the dark side and general murder. Felicity is a blonde who dresses in business casual. The Australian commando, Slade Wilson, is an played by an Irish Maori, and you can be darned certain he has a distinct way of speaking.

Since we mention speaking...

5. Which of these shows was written by Joss Whedon?

Joss Whedon is best known for his characters' banter and wit, coining terms like "one-Starbucks town" or "full exorcist twist." He is so well known for his love of language, there's at least one book dedicated to it, Slayer Slang. For his short-lived series Firefly, he created a combination of Old West terminology as adapted to outer space, with swear words in Chinese to slip past the censors.

However, for Agents of SHIELD, there's a distinct lack of that. Sure, it goes with the lack of character, but come now, would a one-liner every now and then kill the writers?

Then there's Arrow, where the banter kicks in shortly after Oliver Queen starts getting sidekicks. And even then... Here, some random samples of just bantering with the primary villain.

Episode nine...which may be too much of an in-joke, but still....

Malcolm Merlyn: What are your thoughts, Oliver?
Oliver Queen: I think the vigilante needs a better code name then "The Hood" or "The Hood Guy."
Malcolm Merlyn: I agree. How about Green Arrow?
Oliver Queen: Lame.

The second to last episode of season one:

Malcolm Merlyn: Ironic, isn't it? Last Christmas, I almost killed you. A few months ago, you saved my life. And now you're here to trying to kill me. You should makeup your mind.

The last episode, when the fate of half the city is at stake:

Tommy Merlyn: It's over. Laurel and me, I mean. She's with Oliver, again. Always.
Malcolm Merlyn: I'm sorry, son.
Tommy Merlyn: Yeah, and he said you wanted to nuke The Glades or something. You know, it's funny, scotch doesn't make it any more believable. Maybe after your Jihad, we can grab some steaks.

Or...

Oliver Queen: Where's the transmitter?
Malcolm Merlyn: Somewhere I can easily get to it.
John Diggle: I doubt it. You'd be too dead.

How about this: dialogue from one character during the same final episode:

Oliver Queen: Mr. Andrews got his lunch?
Felicity Smoak: One Belly Buster with benzodiazepine. Hold the mayo.

Felicity Smoak: Are you okay?
Oliver Queen: My mom and my best friend's dad are involved in a conspiracy that may have dire consequences for the city. And I'm pretty sure they murdered my father. I'm not planning on using the word "okay" again any time soon.

Or...

Oliver Queen: Felicity, are you hacking into the Merlyn Global mainframe?
Felicity Smoak: "Hacking" is such an ugly word. No. I'm... Yeah. Totally hacking into the Merlyn Global mainframe.

And

Felicity Smoak: Well, no. The last time the vigilante paid your mom a visit, you got shot, and I got to play doctor with you. Ahh! My brain thinks the worst way to say things.

Oliver Queen: Felicity, hold onto me tight.
Felicity Smoak: I imagined you saying that under different circumstances ... [pause]Very platonic circumstances.

Congratulations, we've just had more laughs in one episode than in most of the first half of Agents of SHIELD. Why does Arrow look more like a Joss Whedon show than the show with his name on it?

Speaking of writers....

6. Comic book writers are involved in the scripts on Arrow

Arrow is run by Marc Guggenheim, producer and writer, who has a fairly long history in comic books. Geoff Johns, DC Comic book author, has been involved in five episodes. So the primary writer and producer writes comics, and one of the bigger names in comic books is around here.

Agents of SHIELD....Has Jeph Loeb running it. Loeb's biggest claim to fame is the train wreck that was the NBC series Heroes. Perhaps his even bigger train-wreck, Ultimatum, where Scarlet Witch and Quicksilver indulged in Twincest. Joss Whedon? Who's that? He's busy making the next billion-dollar movie, The Avengers: Age of Ultron. Whedon co-wrote the pilot with his brother and sister-in-law, and then his name disappears from the rest of the scripts. And the scripts were done by people with relatively shallow writing credits. Sure, one person has a few credits on Alias and Angel, but it's also got a writer with credits on Lost, because that one ended so well.

Agents of SHIELD was marketed as Joss Whedon's show. He's an executive producer....along with seven other people.

Oh well, now that Heroes is being rebooted, maybe Jeph Loeb will go back to NBC, Joss Whedon will finish Avengers 2 and actually do something for Agents of SHIELD. I can see it now. Save the cheerleader, save Agents of SHIELD.



7. Speed

Arrow starts with our hero on a jungle island, running through the wilderness, jumping over rocks, and blowing stuff up. Within 20 minutes, he's killed two people, had a parkour chase over several buildings; the pilot had three shootouts, and we established an overarching storyline.

Marvel's Agents of SHIELD...okay, that's back to point two. The writers insist that they needed time to build up to the point where the show was actually good -- or, in this case, until The Winter Soldier, where SHIELD is completely dismantled, making Agents of SHIELD into Agents of....Nothing? I guess? Sadly, this is when the series got interesting.

Since the writers knew of this from the beginning, and apparently made a deliberate choice to save the interesting plots for when Winter Soldier comes in and runs over the story. It would have made more sense if this had been made a mid-season replacement, that way a few good episodes could have been used to build up characters we care about right before Winter Soldier comes in and creates an overarching storyline.

This is stupid. Stupid, stupid, stupid.

Speaking of stupid...

8. No one on Arrow is stupid

Despite Batman being "the world's greatest detective," Oliver Queen and company have done more detective work in one season than was in the entire Dark Knight trilogy. Even a relatively minor supporting character, Detective Lance, tries to hunt down our vigilante hero, and even manages to uncover our hero's identity until convinced otherwise. Even the villain in season one is smart enough to have two doomsday devices.

On Agents of SHIELD, even the geniuses don't exactly spend a lot of time being smart... again, until Winter Soldier kicked in, then the writing did as well.

Speaking of bad guys...

9. The villains in Arrow are well developed

Despite how much time AoS spends with the bad guys, their motives are seriously vague and unclear. We're supposed to feel like there's depth to them, but there isn't. Its primary villain is the neo-Nazi Hydra, and Nazis never need motivation, right?

However, before we meet this primary villain (and uncover him in episode 16), the most identifiable antagonist is called Raina, "the girl in the flower dress," whose life had been "changed" in some unspecified way that made her the way she is. What change? No idea. Why? No idea. How? Unspecified magical MRI machine. No, really, a magical MRI machine. The writers give Raina something like sexual tension with her contact to the greater Hydra hierarchy, even breaks him out of jail, and doesn't blink when he gets murdered in front of her, and he disappears from the series, just like the mad scientist written for the pilot.

The traitorous Agent Garrett, the ultimate villain for the season, boils down to being a smiling, happy sociopath who works for Hydra. His depth of character and motivation is so two-dimensional, he might as well be on a comic book page.

Sure, Garrett is fun to watch, as he is played by Bill Paxton, but his character boils down to "I'm evil and I'm glad," with a "I'm dying, and I don't want to" motivation thrown in during the second-to-last episode. At the same time (literally, the last minute of the same episode), his part of Hydra is trying to sell super-soldiers to the military by creating a demand for said soldiers. Wasn't this the plot of The Long Kiss Goodnight? In the late 90s?

In Arrow, season one, villain Malcolm Merlyn wants to destroy the slums of Starling City because his wife was murdered and left for dead there. In fact, Merlyn has his wife's dying words saved in his voice mail, so he can listen to it at regular intervals. It actually leads to a powerful scene, with some of the best acting ever seen out of actor John Barrowman. He's driven by revenge, rage, and enough psychosis for a Tim Burton film.

Even the professional criminals who are driven by profit (assassins, Triads, other generic mobsters) are at least coherent, if not interesting.

There's no real easy segue, so...

10. The Stakes

In Arrow, the fate of an entire city is at stake. In the first season, we start from saving the soul of a city to a doomsday machine that destroys half the town. In season two, there's an army of super-soldiers ready to level the city, led by a tactical genius bent on wrecking everything our hero loves, and killing friends and family alike.

With AoS, while Hydra wants to eventually take over the world (of course!), Garrett's division of Hydra is, for the most part, all about...evading capture. Yup, an entire subdivision of neo-Nazis with an attitude problem wreak havoc and destruction just to stay free as fugitives. Because, apparently, no one ever taught them that one part of evading capture included laying low, and not clustering with other fugitives.

One could make an argument here that leaving any Hydra agents running around free is in itself a threat, but it's not an active threat. They're not doing anything. In fact, from the scenes at the end of The Winter Soldier, the audience knows that the upper management of Hydra doesn't care about the lower management. These guys are causing death doom and destruction to keep the authorities busy, but doing so actually keeps them on the radar of the people who want to hunt them down and kill them. It makes no sense! What part of "lying low" do they not understand?

But, oh, wait, army of super-soldiers, can't forget that ... as it is crammed in .... in the last minute.... of the penultimate episode. What?

And now for the reasons Agents of SHIELD kicks back:

1. The movie tie-ins

Let's face it, even though Agents had some pretty blatant movie tie-ins that had nothing to do with the films, some of those episodes worked surprisingly well. One episode, called “The Well,” was about an Asgardian artifact that turned anyone who touched it into an always-angry, neigh-unstoppable berserker. It even had the most depth for Agent Ward, revealing that, yes, he really did have a personality somewhere in there, and it was angry. It just happened to take place right after the events of Thor: The Dark World, but had nothing whatsoever to do with it. Coincidence, right? The connection was weak as a film tie-in, but it still led to an interesting episode.

Another tie-in was an episode called "Yes Men", in which an Asgardian fugitive from the breakout in The Dark World comes to Earth with the intention of starting an army to...take over the world. Why? ...Because. However, it was saved by something to be discussed in a moment.

And the tie-ins with The Winter Soldier have been fun ... and the last six or so episodes were nothing but tie-ins to Winter Soldier.

2. Guest spots and cameos

The cameos have been fun. In fact, "Yes Men" was entirely stolen by Jamie Alexander, the Lady Sif from the Thor films. “The Well” was an episode stolen by Peter MacNicol, who gave a great performance as an Asgardian warrior who decided he liked Earth, and stayed behind ... though it would have been nice if someone had him on speed dial after SHIELD fell apart (#11: Arrow remembers previous character appearances).

Saffron Burrows made for a handy Red Herring as the character Victoria Hand, who in the comics had started out as something of a villain. Mariah Hill's appearance in a post-Winter Soldier episode was a pleasant surprise, and very well executed. And it's always nice when Sam Jackson appears to chew the scenery.

But of course, Arrow can't really have cameos from their cinematic universe because ....

3. Agents has a coherent greater universe

I can say a great many things about Arrow that are good, but one thing is clear: DC will never have as coherent a vision as Marvel's cinematic universe. The Dark Knight trilogy has no connection to Man of Steel, and definitely not the Man of Steel sequel, or to Arrow and its upcoming spin-off, The Flash.

And almost none of these have a single connection to the other shows like Gotham, or the upcoming Titans series on TNT.

To be honest, the greatest weakness of AoS has been NOT utilizing the larger Marvel universe--and not necessarily the parts we've seen in the movies. The last thing any of us wanted was a massive film tie-in...even though that's what we seem to have gotten. The little references that Arrow had would have been nice here; AoS only got around to referencing the Marvel-verse within the last few episodes. The primary villain, the traitorous Agent Garrett, was based off of a minor Marvel comic book character. A minor antagonist, Col. Talbot, has been fun, especially when the viewers realize that his comic book CV mostly includes chasing the Incredible Hulk. But that's been it. Early in the season, the cameos were forced and painfully blatant. Later, they become useful and interesting, because Winter Soldier happened and then gave them permission to be interesting.

Thus far, the best episodes have revolved around characters taken from the greater Marvel-verse, both films and comics. The weakness comes when they don't use any of it; the strengths come when they do.

Seriously, Marvel, why are you bothering with original characters? Don't you have enough interesting characters kicking around the comic books to modify for the small screen?

Speaking of original characters...

4. Coulson
Almost everything said about the primary cast of losers cannot apply to Agent Phil "Badass" Coulson, played by actor Clark Gregg. Coulson carries many of the episodes on his back, pulling it off on style alone. Why? He's as close to the every man as the Marvel universe can have without becoming one of the screaming hordes of civilians. He's dry and witty, and despite his formal mannerisms, he always seems to have a twinkle in his eye. Coulson is downright charming, with his quirks of favoring the old-fashioned over the new, and generally being a nice guy.

He's been a fan favorite from almost the get-go and takes almost everything in stride. He's not impressed by superpowers, giant killer robots from space, or Asgardian demigods. He threatened to tase Tony Stark, and attempted to debrief Thor (probably tying him in in red tape for months). When it came down to a mind-blowing, world-shaking twist about who was behind the only consistent mystery from the pilot onward, his reaction was simply "Huh."

And, most impressive of all, Coulson is the one character that Joss Whedon could not kill off permanently.

Strong Female Character Autopsy: Agent Carter and Supergirl

By now, we all know that Supergirl and Agent Carter have failed at being TV shows. The former has been moved from CBS and a $3 billion budget, and the latter has been outright cancelled.

Both have "Strong Female Characters," but is that actually the reason? Not really. Both failed from a failure to act.

If we're all being honest here, Agent Carter's season 1 should have killed it. At worst, women were ignored in the late 40s, not belittled and treated like crap. Almost everyone in her entire office outright hated her. Seriously, how did any of these guys ever have dates with attitudes like that? Carter, in turn, was so hostile to every single male in the office it was grating (hate the people who hate her? Fine. Hate the people who are NICE to her? WTF lady?). By the end of the first season, it had been toned down. And Season 2 almost turned that off completely, which was nice ... then it went soapy with the villains, and finally just went bizarre with a ten minute musical number in one of the last few episodes ... a musical number that came out of nowhere THAT HAD NOTHING TO DO WITH THE REST OF THE STORY.

Gah!

So, no, while it's better than Agents of Stupid, I will not really miss the show. Then again, who'll miss it? It's already got a petition to make it a NetFlix show with fifty thousand names on it. Yes. Really. Maybe then they'll cut back on the ultra-hard "Men are evil, womyn rules" bit entirely, cut out the soap opera, and just stick with halfway decent writing.

At the end of the day, Agent Carter didn't fail because the character wasn't strong enough, or even too strong.

The writing sucked.

Even the good season, number 2, was padded with irrelevant, unnecessary flashbacks that felt like an Arrow knockoff. I didn't care about the crazy super villain going from her politician husband to her gangster boyfriend. I didn't care about the pseudo-Illuminati (Seriously? Evil Businessmen rule the world? What is this? The 90s? Why not have evil white supremacist militias, too?).

Perhaps the writers felt that the character could carry the program. It might have happened if the show had actually spent more time with her. The show is called Agent Carter, not "Super-powered Criminal Minds."

And then there was Supergirl, brought to you by the same man who did The Flash, Arrow, and Legends of Tomorrow.

And it was an utter train wreck, a puff piece of a TV show filled with more cotton candy than a carnival. The characters were very ... chick flick. And no, not a good or witty chick flick (yes, those exist), but bad ones, with all the cliches. You know the ones I'm talking about: eating ice cream with her sister on a couch, talking out her feelings with her friends, and where her true "strength" isn't that she can lift a building, but that's she caring, compassionate and understanding. Are all of these automatically a problem? Not really. The Flash and Arrow also lean heavily on emotional stability, even angst. But the CW programs breaks up these thoughtful moments about our characters' emotional lives with at least four fight scenes an episode, a puzzle to solve, and threats to people we care about.

But for Supergirl, the writers relied on these moments. The better episodes had all of the latter elements. Their episode with a nuclear-powered psychopath hunting Cat Grant, and they had to figure out who the bad guy was, what his motivations were, and how to actually beat him? Those parts were fun, weren't they?

Then there's 15 minutes of Kara whining that Jimmy Olsen called in Superman to save her when it clearly looked like she was getting her ass kicked. Then she had to apologize for whining. Wasn't that fun? No? Yeah, you're not alone. That was so much of the series, it was painful.

What went wrong? Why did a team that puts out a product of quality put out this level of drek?

To start with, Supergirl was originally a project meant for the CW. But CBS wanted it, and obviously wanted it for their targeted audience -- really stupid ten year old girls who didn't know any better, and SJWs who felt like they could pat themselves on the back about such a strooooonnnnggg woman role model. Granted, on Supergirl, there are a lot of moments I can see a good script struggling to get through.

It's one of those moments where I can almost see studio interference doodling on the script pages in crayon. Every time that the show looks like it's going to be awesome, it starts whining.

And Supergirl is budgeted at $3 million an episode? Where'd that money go? Calista Flockhart's salary and hair care? They have THREE major sets -- a bat cave that looks less impressive than Arrow's, an office set, and a spaceship that is only a black room with a CGI table. Are they telling me that it costs $3 million for special effects that aren't much better than the ones Christopher Reeves had? Or was it all because it was shot in LA, and not the cheaper Vancouver of the other Berlanti-verse shows.

I'm figuring the move to the CW could be a vast improvement. Especially if they do something simple and merge the universes. No, I'm not suggestion a four-part crossover even that ends with Supergirl coming to the same universe as the other three shows ... that could be a bit of a Crisis in and of itself. Heh.

Besides, I'm trying to imagine Kara meeting .... anyone on Arrow, really. "Hi, meet Oliver .... no, perhaps Thea .... er, um, Felicity. That's safe. Except Felicity is just like Kara, only without superpowers."

That would be amusing.

At the end of the day, why did these shows fail? You could say that it was political -- you know, writers or studios pushing an agenda. Though I'm not even entirely certain that they know what their agenda was? Was it Grrrl power? In which case, I can recommend a webcomic for you. Was it men are evil? Well, then, it would be strange, since Kara lusted after photographer and part time underwear model Jimmy Olsen, while Agent Carter didn't know what she wanted in her convoluted love life.

So, while it may in part be that CBS wanted a role model for ten year old girls and TrigglyPuff, the simple version is that there wasn't any "there" there. There was no substance, and barely any style. You know you have to worry when one of the most interesting characters on the show was their low-rent Lex Luthor, played by objectivist Maxwell Lord. Hell, I spent the last two episodes screaming at the television for them to stop talking at each other and JUST DO SOMETHING DAMNIT. And while Agent Carter didn't suffer as much from the problem, there was a lot of uneven writing, where they didn't know if they wanted a spy thriller, or if they wanted a soap opera. They tried for both, and got neither. Seriously, when the most interesting character on the show, with the most character development, is Jarvis, not Agent Carter, in the words of Oliver Queen, you have failed this series.

But, again, in the case of Supergirl, I still hold out hope. With the move to Vancouver, expect to see the end of Calista Flockhart, and probably a few of the other actors, who would rather not move to the frozen north. They would rather stay in Hell-A, along with the CBS studio execs who scribbled notes all over the scripts.

And the advantage of being on the CW? Look over the writers of The Flash and Arrow. You might recognize some names. They're comic book writers, like Geoff Johns, or Paul Dini (of the cartoon Batman from the early 90s). And you won't see them on Agent Carter or on Supergirl.

First rule of writing for a comic book show? You might want to know something about comic books.