TV Review: 2017 Season Finale

Several of the shows I'm going to list I haven't done a review of yet, so bear with me.

For example? I have not reviewed...

24: Legacy: It's ... okay. The basic setup hasn't changed. In this particular case, we have an Army Ranger who took out not-Osama knockoff #6. He and his Rangers are being hunted by not-Osama's son. The son is also looking for a list of sleeper cells they want to activate, and one of the Rangers have stolen. Miranda Otto plays a former CTU head who planned the mission. She's married to a Presidential candidate. Hilarious ensues. Our lead is married, and sends his wife to the protection of his brother, the gang leader, so that's another subplot.

Part of the problem with the show was our lead. Yes, they had traded Kiefer Sutherland for a younger black actor, but the problem isn't that he's young, black, or just not Kiefer. That isn't the problem-- it's that everybody was more interesting. Miranda Otto was interesting, her husband, played by Jimmy Smits (whose father was Gerald MacRanie, go figure) were interesting. Our lead's gangsta brother is more charismatic than he was. I also liked gangstas versus jihadis, that was fun. And we had Oded Fehr (The Mummy, The Mummy Returns) once again playing Middle Eastern.  It was all right. And it's renewed. We'll see how far nostalgia can take them. 7/10

Taken: Yes, this is supposed to be a prequel to the films, only they're really not trying that hard for accuracy. There is only one person who looks like he could turn into a character we saw in the films.

On the one hand, I like the cast. Jennifer Beals needs a career, and she's fun.. One or two characters from The Unit make a return in basically the same roles. And yes, I can see their lead growing up to be Liam Neeson.

Though the pace is incredibly different from the films, ponderous, and very slow some times. Though I must admit, Vince Flynn would be happy with the dead politician count. And it's supposed to be under a Hillary Clinton administration (the President is referred to as "she"), so the depth of the political corruption is hilarious, and I don't think they meant it to be so.

6/10, with room to grow.

iZombie: I originally tripped over this show on NetFlix, tried the first episode, and ended up binging the first season in on go. Then season 2. I was a little worried about Season 3. Would it hold up on a week to week format? Apparently.  The Premise of the series is simple: Zombies are only mindless killers under certain conditions -- but if they get their brains quickly enough, they can pass for albino humans. Olivia "Liv" Moore (yes, breath in the pun) works at a morgue, so she can get her brains. Her boss, Ravi, used to work at the CDC, caught on to her condition, and started thinking "cure." At the end of season 2, we were introduced to a PMC that is filled with zombies, and I thought "oh, come on, are these the bad guys in season 3? This is going to be cliche and sucky."  No.  It isn't. No, they didn't. They took the premise and went a direction I didn't even think of. It's awesome, really. It is funny as all yell, and smart. You might even say that have a really, really nice set .... of brains.

YYYYEEEEAAAAHHHHH

Go, watch it.

10/10... Yes. Really. There hasn't been a sucky episode yet. And it's still broadcasting.

The Arrowverse.


Sigh. I'm done with The Flash, Supergirl, probably done with Legends of the Idiots. Arrow is the only one that's tolerable lately.

The problem is still that the season-long plot is overshadowing the villain of the week, and I liked the villain du jour method of handling problems. I remember when they used to be able to do both at once.

• The Flash: They lost my interest early on this season. They opened with the "Flashpoint" alternate timeline, and made the start of the season so disorienting that people I watched it with were confused and turned off. Then it went totally downhill, becoming melodrama, and completely rejecting any and all sense of plot and story for the sake of whining. Then there's a vision of the future where Iris is murdered, and everyone's attention is focused on saving her.... it might have been nice if I cared about the character. Iris died in the comics, time for her to die in the show, too. Barry will get over it. 4/10
• Legends of Tomorrow: Due to schedule conflicts, Arthur Darville, Captain Hunter, left for the first half of the season. This put Sarah Lance in charge of the ship. And I don't think I cared when she seduced a French queen while her colleagues were being shot at -- oh, wait, I really do. They plain old pissed me off when they put Guinevere in plate armor AND had her making out with Sarah. And their Union versus Zombies episode? Don't even get me started on that BS. Right now, I'd be more interested in a Captain Cold and Heat Wave TV show, except they already have that on Fox, and it's called Prison Break. 4/10
• Supergirl: Agit-prop dumpster fire where they care less for plot and character than any of the shows above, and that is an extremely difficult challenge. 1/10
• Arrow: Aside from some editing, and needing a shorter season, season 5 was fairly solid. And the return of Manu Bennett was nice to see. I only hope that means he can come back to the show on a regular basis now. But they lose an entire point for attempting to do a gun control episode, and doing it poorly; it was message fiction that barely had a coherent message. Also, for their torture Oliver episode. 7/10

MacGyver: I watch for the Murdoc episodes. That actor chews scenery in an entertaining fashion. It's fun to watch. And while it's gotten better than the first episodes, it's still mediocre. 5/10

NCIS: This was a strange season, and I think it took have the season for them to get their bearings. The cast seems tired of showing up, and Gibbs has less and less screentime. I'm waiting for them to have Gibbs die, set MacGee up as team leader, and we can close the book on this show before it turns into original CSI on us. Because right now, the minute that actors David MacCallum, Paulie Perrette, or Sean Murray die, or decide to leave the show, the producers had better hit the panic button, because I will stop watching soon after. 6-/10, depending on the episode.

NCIS: Los Angeles -- I say this every time, but someone has to stop pretending that LL Cool J and Chris O'Donnell are interesting. I watch for .... pretty much everyone else, really. There is some fun character byplay that, at times, reminds me of Homicide: Life on the Streets. 7/10

NCIS: New Orleans -- This was a very strange season. I'm not even sure if I liked where they ended up. At least they remembered to have New Oreleans in their New Orleans show.  6/10.

Scorpion: I like the pacing. I like the characters, who have turned into entertaining people instead of the cardboard caricatures from the first episode. But good Lord, someone tell them to stop pretending to have something like science. The space rocket episode? No. Just no. Mileage may vary. 6-8/10

Hawaii 5-0: It's okay. Nothing really stood out about this season. Though I'm getting tired of the old married couple bickering of our main characters. You'd think they'd tone it down after a while. 6/10

Blue Bloods: Solid series. Generally sane. They usually deal with topics as apolitically as possible. But there were still a few elements of pure stupid in there. They avoided some of the SJW scripts this season, I don't know how, but they did. Congrats, guys.  9/10.

Criminal Minds: AAARRRRGGGGHHHH. If anyone does a repeat of this season, I'm done. While the season-long story arc had a satisfactory conclusion, good God, it was painful to watch .... I'm sorry, not watch, fast forward through. "Spencer in jail" was a waste of time, generally not interesting, and I was able to pick up on what was happening while I sped through the Shawshank sequences.  6/10, and don't do that again.

Bull: Eh. I generally like the series.  It's mostly a 6/10, though the last few episodes were closer to 8/10 -- mostly due to the introduction of Eliza Dushku, a character who could talk at least as good a game as Michael Weatherly. If we keep her for season 2, I'll probably even watch.

Lucifer: With the introduction of Tricia Helfer as Lucifer's mother, a goddess, they lost any pretense of this being the Judeo-Christian Devil, and basically turned the show into a straight-up urban fantasy. I guess that could be seen as an improvement, so they're obviously tossing out any standard mythology around Lucifer. Also, since there is no reference to Jesus as a historical event within the universe, it pretty much makes this more Zoroastrian than Judeo-Christian. Turn your brain off, enjoy the insanity. It's a comedy police procedural ... almost like Castle. Only more insane. 8/10

Elementary: It was okay. The season finale subplot was out of left field, and jarring, and I'm not sure I was a fan of the primary arch. Tolerable, and generally entertaining. 7/10.

The Blacklist: The second half of the season had nothing to do with the first half, and that's a positive. The war with "Mister Kaplan" was an interesting battle, and there's a glimmer of an explanation behind everything going on. But I think they have only one more season left to them. They've broken up the story into half-seasons, and it's getting a little tedious. Finish it, or ratings finish you, Blacklist. 7/10-- points deducted for the first half of the season sucking so much.

Lethal Weapon:  Still the best series of the season. 10/10. If you haven't watched, you're missing out. It has heart, humor, character development, and a great balanced between solo episodes and overall season plot. I miss this series, and next season needs more episodes. Watch it, and throw out the Mel Gibson films.

The Dragon Awards are open and ready for nominations, and I have a list of suggestions you might want to take a look at. If you already  have a good idea of what you want, just click here to go and vote for them. The instructions are right there.

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The Love at First Bite series. 

    

Miseason Review: Legends of Tomorrow, and Invasion!

This one may be shorter than I thought.

On the one hand, this show has improved since last season. Last season, the writing was so uneven, some episodes were great, and some felt like they were a failed writing class.

This season needed more focus. They've wandered all over the place, and they needed more direction with where they were going.

Also, there is a slight problem with the lack of Captain Hunter this year. I understand it's because actor Arthur Darville is busy elsewhere. But really, we needed a steadier hand at the helm sooner. Sarah Lance as Captain is awesome, but the crew needs work.

I was also disappointed that Stargirl happened, then the Shade happened on the Flash. Both were elements of James Robinson's Starman run, and I think they shut the door on that ever happening.

Anyway, I'll be sticking with this show, mostly because their midseason finale revealed that, yes, they do know where they're going, and have finally hinted at the plans of the villains. Also, they keep having cameos by Snart, and promise to bring him back.

Right now, their strength this season is by reusing bad guys, and in a way that makes it reasonable to bring them back. Granted, the time travel bit is getting a little confusing (Wait, you killed a guy because you're going to fight in constantly in his future ... but if you kill him now, why should he ever run into you ever again? Huh? WATCH SOME DOCTOR WHO.)

The best part of this series, and perhaps any of the Berlantiverse this year, has been the massive four-way crossover.

Yes, I'll review that now. Because why not?

The Supergirl part was the weakest of them all, for several reasons: one, it's Supergirl. Two, you could have skipped it and just gone to The Flash.

... But that was a massive misstep. That episode of Supergirl had a bioweapon that could target and destroy any alien that wasn't from Krypton. The smart move would have been to bring that back to the main Arrowverse and just kill the aliens. But they didn't. And thus the episode was as irrelevant as the show is. Maybe they figured there was no overlap between the Supergirl and The Flash audience.

The Flash episode ... could have been better. They came up with a contrived way to make everyone pissed off at Barry. Granted, the scenes between Oliver and Barry that produced was fun, but that's it. They went through a lot of contrived loops to make it so that Barry and Oliver were isolated, so they could do an -- admittedly awesome -- hero v hero sequence.

The Arrow episode was a good 100th .... just didn't really do much for the story arc

And their episode for Legends was pretty darn good.

But 2.5 good episodes out of 4? Not a good batting average.

Anyway, if you liked what you read and want to click on a book, try one of the below

And if you've read these, a review would be nice. Thanks.

 

Midseason Review: The Flash

Let's just start with something simple: I would really like to enjoy The Flash. I really would. But they make this so hard, it's insane.

For the entire calendar year of 2016, Season 2 and 3 on The Flash had more to do with whiny angsty soap opera crying about crap that's easily fixed, or that people have no control over, or JUST. PLAIN. STUPID. CRAP.

You thought that it was a joke yesterday when I said that I fast forwarded through fifteen minutes out of every Supergirl episodes. The Flash is also a problem when it comes to this.  And it drives me crazy.

In fact, one of my biggest problems with Season 3 has been how little they're focusing on the villain of the week, and trying to focus on a primary villain for the season.

Except that some of the times they actually do try to make a villain du jour is ... half-hearted, at best, and a train wreck at worst.

And what is my problem?

Let me introduce you to Richard Swift, aka: The Shade.

I am such a fan of the James Robinson Starman comic, which had, as a side character, a Flash villain called The Shade.

He looks like, well, this.

Yes, with those specs, he looks like hipster Jack the Ripper. But his powers really are from Hell. No, not from a reactor, not from lightning strikes, but from sacrificing over a hundred lives (I think over 300, but I could be mistaken). His powers are essentially demonic in nature. He would call creatures from the shadows that look like the demons of Ghost. I'm relatively certain that he could have taken out the Flash -- any of them -- except he was too busy having fun. He was generally amoral, immortal, and had more than enough money on his own.

And the Shade was cultured. He quoted Len Deighton novels and Igmar Bergman films, and was friends with Dickens and Wilde and Hans Christian Anderson.

He. Was. Awesome.

And after I saw Stargirl on Legends of Tomorrow, my first thought was "Can I get the Shade now on Flash? Pretty please?"

And then, I see an episode title in the listings called: Shade.

YES!!!!!

I got .... nothing.

Really, nothing.

This is what I got. This is the best image my google-fu can come up with.

He wasn't The Shade, just "Shade." He didn't call up shadow constructs, he turned into a shadow golem. He didn't have a name. He didn't have any dialogue. He didn't have motivation. In fact, I'm not even entirely certain why he killed the victim in the opening, and I really hope to God it wasn't just for money, because he could turn into a shadow and walk into banks if he wanted to AND WHY AM I PUTTING UP WITH THIS CRAP? WHERE IS JAMES ROBINSON?

Hell, so much of the episode dealt with the year-long arc, I'm trying to figure out why they even bothered with an enemy du jour in the first place. And to grossly, painfully, and deliberately use a character who was so freaking awesome for the near decade of Starman comics ... this really pissed me off.

And that's only ONE element of this that pisses me off.

This season started with a highly disorienting Flashpoint alternate timeline, which was then reversed. Honestly, I can't tell you why messing with time released this year's enemy, even though I'm certain they've mentioned it at least once. Then they brought out an enemy so obvious, HE'S PLAYED BY DRACO MALFOY.  I mean, seriously. Might as well have "Villain" tattooed on his forehead. And for some reason, Caitlin Snow is manifesting Killer Frost powers ... why? How? When did this happen? No idea. Never explained. Why do her powers turn her evil? No idea. Never explained.

So far, the best elements of this season involved their Christmas episode, which actually explained something .... and the crossover episode.

This is another one I might have totally given up on. I haven't decided yet. Though, honestly, there's nothing else on Tuesday night in that time slot except for NCIS. So, maybe. But I doubt it. There have been 9 episodes this season, and it feels like there may have been 4 episodes worth of content going on here. They should really and truly stop it.

And the first person who tells me that Agents of Suck is good this season, no, I don't want a Ghost Rider TV show. Thanks.

Here. Here's something way more interesting, and a crap ton less angsty and whiny than any single episode this year.

 

Midseason Review: Supergirl

The first half of the season is done. Time to break them down.

Item the First

It's a puff piece, it's agit-prop, no, it's Supergirl!

Dear, God, SOMEBODY SAVE THIS SHOW.

Sigh. Too late.

Okay, fine, let's break this down.

The Good: The move for the CW has definitely improved the series. In the first few episodes, you can see the budget actually show up on the screen.

 I guess that means that the filming on location in LA really did eat up most of the budget while they were on CBS.


There is obvious effort put in here and there. The end result of the villain Parasite, for example, wasn't that bad. I say the end result because he was really a global warming fanatic who went insane.

They had one or two obvious character choices for certain players that they did not take that surprised me -- mostly, their decision to not make every member of the Luthor family into a flaming psychopath.

And, to be honest, I don't mind their Superman. I mean, heck, he SMILES. Was a Superman allowed to smile since Christopher Reeves? Hell, Brandon Routh was so dang stiff, he should have been an awesome Superman. He wasn't even allowed to smile until he became Ray Palmer, and now, he makes a great Clark Kent on Legends of Tomorrow ... as the wrong character.

The Bad: everything else.

No, really. This is bad. The opening of the season wasn't that bad. It had Kara and Clark, and it wasn't that bad ... okay, the Cat Grant lusting after a man who is obviously 15-20 years younger than herself was amazingly creepy, and everyone else just looked uncomfortable without calling her on it.

The primary thread for the season revolves around "anti-alien sentiment" and a "home-grown terrorist group, Cadmus." I mean, I can't imagine why anyone would have harsh feelings against aliens. I mean, they nearly DESTROYED THE PLANET last season. Though they actually have some counterpoint to this thinly-veiled political analogue, with even the Martian Manhunter directly opposing an "alien amnesty" proposed by a President Lynda Carter. So they have some props there.

And, seriously, "amnesty"? I'm sorry, in a world where Superman has official citizenship of the United States, are they telling me there's no way for these people to just fill out some paperwork? Is INS / ICE really still screwed up, even in the DCU? Are we kidding?

And we won't even get into the blunt forced message fiction about Kara's sister becoming a lesbian out of ... nowhere, really. Yes, the character of Officer Leslie Thompson from the Superman comic was gay ... then again, so was Rene Montoya, Cassandra Kane, and about half the women in the DC universe feel like they're at least bi, if not 100% lesbian. But they've spent so much time with the sister becoming gay, and less and less time addressing an overall plot. I fast forward through at least a third of every episode, looking for a plot. Kickass female characters ... and they made them gay. Yes, of course. Because "kickass" somehow must mean ... what? Butch? Therefore gay? Um, no, people. That's not how this works.

The sister's sudden coming out of the closet is particularly startling after first season and her having a relationship with Maxwell Lord -- who was so overbearing and overshadowing last season, his disappearance this season is whiplash-inducing.

Oh, and then there's Jimmy Olsen becoming the Guardian .... Do I even have to explain why this is a bad idea? Jimmy Olsen ... as a superhero.  Somehow, Jimmy Olsen is a cross between Iron Man and Batman. Look at him. He's even IN IRON MAN'S SUPERHERO POSE.

Even Kara mentions how her cousin sometimes works with a guy with a lot of gadgets and a lot of issues -- ie, Batman.

Oh, does this mean I can have Batman now? Please? Pretty please?

But, yeah, Jimmy Olsen as a superhero ... because the son of the Toyman made him a suit. Um, point of order, but did Wynn cobble together this super suit out of DEO technology? Did no one notice what had to be millions of dollars in hardware suddenly going missing? Is it as inefficiently run as every other government organization that millions can just disappear without anyone noticing? And screw that, now we just have the problem that Tony Stark has -- why is Wynn not making Guardian suits fro everyone in the DEO? Considering the amount of crap that they have to put up with on a daily basis, why hasn't Wynn made an entire SWAT team suits like this?

Worst of all ... why is JIMMY OLSEN having more time on screen as a superhero THAN SUPERGIRL. You know, in a series called SUPERGIRL?

Yes, I do consider it possible that Supergirl could recover. There was hint that Lynda Carter's President was an alien, suggesting that she be an alien menace, and that all of this illegal immigration analogy falls apart. But I don't see it happening, I truly don't.

And the sad thing is that this is all so easily fixable. I honestly don't care about Kara's sister and her new girlfriend -- that the sister has become gay, or that she has a girlfriend -- if they focused less on that and more on THE PLOT, I'll be happy.

In fact, you will find that complaint very often in the Berlantiverse reviews.  I want less focus on interpersonal relationships, and more of a plot. The sad thing is, for Supergirl, this is still an improvement over last season.

I may keep watching, if I have additional brain cells I feel like sacrificing. Otherwise, this is one hero I can without.

And, I can say without any shame at all, you're better off reading any of the following books.

 

Superhero Fight Club 2.0

Watch the shiny special effects and the dancing. It makes about as much sense as the first one, but it's cute.

It makes even less sense when you consider that they're still keeping the Supergirl universe separate from the Arrowverse, but if you're interested in making sense, don't go into comic books.

Strong Female Character Autopsy: Agent Carter and Supergirl

By now, we all know that Supergirl and Agent Carter have failed at being TV shows. The former has been moved from CBS and a $3 billion budget, and the latter has been outright cancelled.

Both have "Strong Female Characters," but is that actually the reason? Not really. Both failed from a failure to act.

If we're all being honest here, Agent Carter's season 1 should have killed it. At worst, women were ignored in the late 40s, not belittled and treated like crap. Almost everyone in her entire office outright hated her. Seriously, how did any of these guys ever have dates with attitudes like that? Carter, in turn, was so hostile to every single male in the office it was grating (hate the people who hate her? Fine. Hate the people who are NICE to her? WTF lady?). By the end of the first season, it had been toned down. And Season 2 almost turned that off completely, which was nice ... then it went soapy with the villains, and finally just went bizarre with a ten minute musical number in one of the last few episodes ... a musical number that came out of nowhere THAT HAD NOTHING TO DO WITH THE REST OF THE STORY.

Gah!

So, no, while it's better than Agents of Stupid, I will not really miss the show. Then again, who'll miss it? It's already got a petition to make it a NetFlix show with fifty thousand names on it. Yes. Really. Maybe then they'll cut back on the ultra-hard "Men are evil, womyn rules" bit entirely, cut out the soap opera, and just stick with halfway decent writing.

At the end of the day, Agent Carter didn't fail because the character wasn't strong enough, or even too strong.

The writing sucked.

Even the good season, number 2, was padded with irrelevant, unnecessary flashbacks that felt like an Arrow knockoff. I didn't care about the crazy super villain going from her politician husband to her gangster boyfriend. I didn't care about the pseudo-Illuminati (Seriously? Evil Businessmen rule the world? What is this? The 90s? Why not have evil white supremacist militias, too?).

Perhaps the writers felt that the character could carry the program. It might have happened if the show had actually spent more time with her. The show is called Agent Carter, not "Super-powered Criminal Minds."

And then there was Supergirl, brought to you by the same man who did The Flash, Arrow, and Legends of Tomorrow.

And it was an utter train wreck, a puff piece of a TV show filled with more cotton candy than a carnival. The characters were very ... chick flick. And no, not a good or witty chick flick (yes, those exist), but bad ones, with all the cliches. You know the ones I'm talking about: eating ice cream with her sister on a couch, talking out her feelings with her friends, and where her true "strength" isn't that she can lift a building, but that's she caring, compassionate and understanding. Are all of these automatically a problem? Not really. The Flash and Arrow also lean heavily on emotional stability, even angst. But the CW programs breaks up these thoughtful moments about our characters' emotional lives with at least four fight scenes an episode, a puzzle to solve, and threats to people we care about.

But for Supergirl, the writers relied on these moments. The better episodes had all of the latter elements. Their episode with a nuclear-powered psychopath hunting Cat Grant, and they had to figure out who the bad guy was, what his motivations were, and how to actually beat him? Those parts were fun, weren't they?

Then there's 15 minutes of Kara whining that Jimmy Olsen called in Superman to save her when it clearly looked like she was getting her ass kicked. Then she had to apologize for whining. Wasn't that fun? No? Yeah, you're not alone. That was so much of the series, it was painful.

What went wrong? Why did a team that puts out a product of quality put out this level of drek?

To start with, Supergirl was originally a project meant for the CW. But CBS wanted it, and obviously wanted it for their targeted audience -- really stupid ten year old girls who didn't know any better, and SJWs who felt like they could pat themselves on the back about such a strooooonnnnggg woman role model. Granted, on Supergirl, there are a lot of moments I can see a good script struggling to get through.

It's one of those moments where I can almost see studio interference doodling on the script pages in crayon. Every time that the show looks like it's going to be awesome, it starts whining.

And Supergirl is budgeted at $3 million an episode? Where'd that money go? Calista Flockhart's salary and hair care? They have THREE major sets -- a bat cave that looks less impressive than Arrow's, an office set, and a spaceship that is only a black room with a CGI table. Are they telling me that it costs $3 million for special effects that aren't much better than the ones Christopher Reeves had? Or was it all because it was shot in LA, and not the cheaper Vancouver of the other Berlanti-verse shows.

I'm figuring the move to the CW could be a vast improvement. Especially if they do something simple and merge the universes. No, I'm not suggestion a four-part crossover even that ends with Supergirl coming to the same universe as the other three shows ... that could be a bit of a Crisis in and of itself. Heh.

Besides, I'm trying to imagine Kara meeting .... anyone on Arrow, really. "Hi, meet Oliver .... no, perhaps Thea .... er, um, Felicity. That's safe. Except Felicity is just like Kara, only without superpowers."

That would be amusing.

At the end of the day, why did these shows fail? You could say that it was political -- you know, writers or studios pushing an agenda. Though I'm not even entirely certain that they know what their agenda was? Was it Grrrl power? In which case, I can recommend a webcomic for you. Was it men are evil? Well, then, it would be strange, since Kara lusted after photographer and part time underwear model Jimmy Olsen, while Agent Carter didn't know what she wanted in her convoluted love life.

So, while it may in part be that CBS wanted a role model for ten year old girls and TrigglyPuff, the simple version is that there wasn't any "there" there. There was no substance, and barely any style. You know you have to worry when one of the most interesting characters on the show was their low-rent Lex Luthor, played by objectivist Maxwell Lord. Hell, I spent the last two episodes screaming at the television for them to stop talking at each other and JUST DO SOMETHING DAMNIT. And while Agent Carter didn't suffer as much from the problem, there was a lot of uneven writing, where they didn't know if they wanted a spy thriller, or if they wanted a soap opera. They tried for both, and got neither. Seriously, when the most interesting character on the show, with the most character development, is Jarvis, not Agent Carter, in the words of Oliver Queen, you have failed this series.

But, again, in the case of Supergirl, I still hold out hope. With the move to Vancouver, expect to see the end of Calista Flockhart, and probably a few of the other actors, who would rather not move to the frozen north. They would rather stay in Hell-A, along with the CBS studio execs who scribbled notes all over the scripts.

And the advantage of being on the CW? Look over the writers of The Flash and Arrow. You might recognize some names. They're comic book writers, like Geoff Johns, or Paul Dini (of the cartoon Batman from the early 90s). And you won't see them on Agent Carter or on Supergirl.

First rule of writing for a comic book show? You might want to know something about comic books.

Season in Review: the DOA -- Castle, Agent Carter, and Supergirl

There have been so many shows this season, I van't even keep track, really.

So let's start with the dead, or the dying.

To start with, Yes, Castle has finally bit the bullet. But let's face it, we knew that it was dead the moment that Stana Katic wasn't going to come back. It has been eight seasons of utter insanity, and I enjoyed every minute of it. You could say that it taught me how to do romance ... though not quite as drawn out. Hell, you could even say that this was the tv show that taught network television that, yes, you CAN have a man and a woman get married and grow together as a couple, and not kill the show.

But, alas, it couldn't go on forever. You knew it was on its last legs when Season 7 ended neatly. I knew it was on it's last season with the incredibly shaky opening this season.

Oh well. All in all, it was a fun ride. And it will be missed.

Agent Carter, on the other hand, won't be. While I like the character of Peggy Carter, the show ... oh my God, the show. It had two modes: fun or brain dead. While the second season cut back on the out and out man-hating from season 1, there was a lot of talking and not a lot of actually doing anything. Seriously, people, the secret to a tv show is that STUFF ACTUALLY HAPPENS. As strange as that might be. In Europe, it is "the cinema" so we could see all the things on screen. In America, they're movies, because THEY MOVE. Remember that.

Of course, the past of Peggy Carter was completely irrelevant to the story. While it was amusing to see them at least acknowledge that Carter was a Bletchley girl, I didn't need to know that she was going to be a normal woman at one point. Who cared? Get on with the story. And then, in one of the last episodes, we had a 10-15 minute musical number while she was knocked out.

I will not miss this show. Good night, Miss Carter. You missed every opportunity to surpass Agents of SHIELD, and I look forward to when I can write the obituary on that show, too.

On the other hand, then there's Supergirl -- a preachy, whiny, wussy little show that somehow manages to spend over $3 million an episode. How does it do that? They don't really have an awful lot of stunts. Not even a ton of special effects. The sets might cost that much, but I'm a little curious where all that money went, because it wasn't on the screen.

Season 1 was a massive disappointment to me, and it can be summed up in the last two episodes. Yes, the last two episodes boiled down to "STOP TALKING AND DEBATING AND JUST DO SOMETHING. ANYTHING."  I didn't quite throw things at the tv, but it was close.

Also, there is something truly wrong with the show when it has a crossover with The Flash, and wastes it. I'm reasonably certain that they made Barry Allen dumber for his appearance on ths show -- it's the only reason I can imagine they had him throw lightning at someone made from pure electricity. And similarly stupid things. The only reason to watch that episode boiled down to watching the dynamic of Flash and Supergirl interacting.

The sad thing is that the entire point of the last two episodes, "Hope conquers all," is being covered to better effect on Arrow at the same time.

It's especially disappointing when the final fight scene for Supergirl was Kara and her uncle Non blasting at each other with eye beams. The result was for Non's eyes to explode, and him apparently dying. Please consider that the actor for that was Chris Vance, the same man who did some great Jason Statham fight scenes on a weekly basis in a Transporter TV show. And no one figured out that maybe having an epic knock-down drag-out for a season finale might, just might, have been a good thing.

Can you tell I'm annoyed?

While this show is not dead, it is moving to The CW, which is a good thing. I suspect that 90% of the problems with the show come from direct studio interference. They had one demographic, and guided the show for that demographic and that alone, completely ignoring every other type of possible viewer. Maybe whoever was jerking it around at CBS will be hands off when it comes to CW, and maybe the 8 million viewers will follow along with it.

And, with that show, Greg Berlanti will own Monday-Thursday at 8 pm on the CW, with Friday as a day off. Just imagine that crossover between Arrow, The Flash, Supergirl, and Legends of Tomorrow. You'd think that crossover might be a bit of a mess.

You might even call it .... a Crisis.

BWAHAHAAHAHAA

The Catholic Geek: Superbowl Edition

The Catholic Geek: Superbowl Edition



Host Declan Finn once against tackles a broadcast all by himself by completely ignoring the Superbowl, but does stop to make fun of Liz Bourke of Tor, Marvel's tv shows, and deliver some news about Deadpool, the Hugos, and maybe even do a reading from his work. Again.

The Berlantiverse: Arrow, Flash, Supergirl (Midseason review)

Greg Berlanti, in his attempt to save DC Comics media from itself (most importantly, from it's movie department), has been doing everything himself -- up to and including giving a "not" Justice League their own limited run series.

Let's start with the new kid on the block-- Supergirl.  While it started off with an okay pilot, and a three or four-block of episodes that were somewhat mediocre (and whiny), this show has finally gotten off the ground, and up up and away. With the debut of characters like Red Tornado and Dr. T.O. Morrow, up to and including the Martian Manhunter.

They were so close to screwing it up and making it a soap opera, but they've decided to actually have a comic book show.

Now, granted, there are some things that are fitting close to pattern. For example, they're using a lot of Superman tropes, up to and including Max Lord as a makeshift Lex Luthor.  But they've finally got it working for them, and cut back on the feminist tripe and cliche`, and decided to go into an actual SUPERHERO SERIES. Heck, leave it to Berlanti to have an episode where they point out that Superpowered people still need hand to hand combat experience.

But Supergirl finally has an overarching plot, and it's all the better for it.

Then there's Arrow. After a season three that was so damn dark it needed NVGs, Arrow has a sense of humor. Oliver Queen has a sense of humor, at long last. We've even got a bad guy with charisma and something that looks like charm. Heck, we've basically got a bond villain in Damien Dhark, only with magical powers. Despite having a season where we're bringing people back from dead after digging up their desiccated corpse, and a visit from John Constantine, as well as going back to that lousy island, this show is STILL visibly brighter than last time out.

Most importantly? They're cutting back on a LOT of the soap opera elements. Thank God.

Which is interesting, because the bright and cheerful The Flash is getting a little darker. Not much, but a little. But they've been working so hard on expanding the universe, so much so that they've included another universe. Then again, they also have magic and time travel.  Short version? I'm looking forward to Legends of Tomorrow, even though I really do think that's a terrible name for a TV show. Though I also want to see King Shark again, because that character design looked AMAZING.

Also, Berlanti seems to be building up to a Green Lantern tv show, especially with all the various and sundry references to Hal Jordan's Coast City, as well as his place of business, Ferris Air.

Speaking of which, did anyone else note that Supergirl mentioned Opal City? Can I have Starman now? Or at least The Shade?

Legends are coming

So, I took a good look at this.  I say look because I'm literally next to a sleeping person as I write this, but I have a pretty good feel for this one without the audio.

Superman! Suicide Squad! Who cares?

A while ago, Kevin Feige, currently running the phases of Marvels' movies, has mentioned that Marvel will never go "GrimDark," like the first Batman vs. Superman trailer.

As he said it, I discovered I had the perfect word for what's happening with my tv shows. Seriously, multiple shows in my TV watching season, some of the better ones, have started going into ... bleak, dark, utterly hopeless crap. I'm really kinda tired of it.

But then came the new trailers over at Comic Con.

I guess the first question to ask is: Why is Kyra Segwick is in this film? Why, God? Why? Superman testifying before a Senate hearing? Batfleck shoehorned into the previous Superman film?

You know, the film Man of Steel felt like someone rewrote the awesome Superman: Earth One comic book by the amazing J. Michael Straczynski.

This feels like someone read the other two volumes and said "Hey, wouldn't it be just great if we crammed Batman into this?"

Sigh.

A few thoughts on Supergirl

This latest DC television show is brought to you by Greg Berlanti, who's busy taking over the CW network with Flash and Arrow, and whoever else he can get his hands on.  For some reason, CW didn't want his Supergirl project. So, he went to CBS.

My first thought, as I looked at Kara and her civilian dress?  "Did they just give Felicity Smoake Superpowers?"  Because the awkwardness and personality kinda match up.

My second thought was "Why is Calista Flockhart on this show? In fact, why is she employed? And can she be the villain?"

I like the feel of this, especially in the wake of the GrimDark Batman Vs. Superman trailer, which if it gets any blacker will require night vision goggles to see anything. I'm seriously, seriously tired of the GrimDark. This? This is bright and colorful and things blow up.

Though there are some odd moments I have with what's going on here, and it's probably the editing of the trailer: You have an army guy who deals with aliens dismissing the woman who can redirect a plane and stop bullets as someone who gets coffee?  Huh? What?  I think someone had time to fill and didn't know what to stuff in.

Another head tilt moment: Jimmy Olsen in the comics is a scrawny, nerdy, redheaded stepchild. They've turned him into a tall, knowledgeable, suave fellow .... who's black. The ethnic swap is the least of these changes, but the character changes are such that I'm thinking "Why even name the guy Jimmy Olsen?" Now, if they're going with the awesome, awesome graphic novel Superman Earth One, which had Jimmy Olsen as a former embedded war photographer who will do anything to get a picture .... that would be fun.  But this guy comes off as less Jimmy Olsen and more elder-mentor type.  At which point, is Perry White so damn copyrighted? Really?

Again, it might be how the trailer was put together that we're missing a lot of context. It might turn out to be stupid, but you know what, this at least looks like fun. And when DC comics seems to think that Grim and Gritty is the way to go, I'll take a heroine who smiles.

But my real problem?  I miss John Williams.

The Puppies of WoldCon, an Epilogue

UPDATE:  It's now a series. Click the Sad Puppies tab above for new content.

Or: Sad Puppies Bite Back, Part IV

So, yeah, here we go again.

I hang out with a lot of writers.  They have liked the previous Sad Puppy stories.  So they give me bits of business they would have liked to have seen....

The cycle begins anew.

If you're someone who hasn't been enjoying these articles ... feel free to comment and tell me something you DO want to see. I've been posting Puppies every other day, so tell me what you'd want to see on those days. I'm running out of music blogs anyway.  There will be a book review tomorrow.

While I think about it -- MY VAMPIRE NOVEL FINAL EDITS ARE DONE.  The next step is typesetting, then publishing. I'm told it might get to be published by September, so that should be interesting.

By the way, in other news, I'm thinking of posting A Pius Legacy (book 2) for free on Kindle in the next month. So watch this space for more on that. I figure that since A Pius Man is book 1, A Pius Stand is book 3, this should be like making people want to see A New Hope and Return of the Jedi by handing out Empire Strikes Back.  We'll see if that works.

But that's for later.

Now?

UNLEASH THE PUPPIES.

MATT BOWMAN, THE NOVEL NINJA

[SWAT comes up to a house made entirely of Lego Bricks.  They hit the door with a battering ram. The door disintegrates.  The SWAT team tries to charge in, but the Lego bricks act like caltrops, and hurt like a bastard.  They swarm through the house until they end up in the bed room. There is The Novel Ninja, Matthew Bowman, clothed in black from head to toe, sitting in a wheelchair.  He sits back, fingers steepled, perfectly calm]  May I help you gentlemen?

[SWAT leader looks confused] 911 had a call of a madman waving a gun around, threatening to kill someone.

[Bowman spreads his hands to indicate the rest of the house]  You obviously didn't find anyone else in the house, and I assure you I haven't been waving a gun around. I propose to you that I have been SWATted, a tactic of certain groups that involves calling in fake 911 calls upon their political adversaries, or people they merely don't like. One of the first incidents on record happened with an Erick Ericsson of Red State news, a conservative news service online. Though we really should look back on similar, older tactics that have been utilized since the dawn of...

[Bowman continues, weaving together a history of Chestertonian thought, Catholic history, Civilization IV, narrative, and, somehow, Lego.  One SWAT member starts bleeding from the eyes and ears, one suffers a grand mal seizure. The others fall back, blasting occasional cover fire.]

[Bowman] ...so you had no grounds for exigent circumstances.

[Bowman waits a moment to listen for the total silence.  He gives a little nod, then wheels himself over to a wall.  He opens up a secret panel.  Inside, there is a wheelchair that looks like it was created for Professor X, only modified by technicians from Mad Max. It is simply labeled "Convention Wheelchair."]  I'll reserve you for DragonCon.

[Bowman looks to a yellow suit hanging next to the wheelchair] I'll use you next time. Maybe if I ever go to WorldCon.

A few things on this one.  Mr. Bowman is a friend, and we've both kidded about his ability to use ten words when one can do. 

Matt doesn't actually call himself "The Novel Ninja," it's just the name of his blog / business. But that doesn't stop, well, anyone, really, from using it as a personal noun, not for just his business.

And if you don't get the Yellow Suit reference ... why aren't you watching The Flash?

Arrow: Black Canary Reveal

If you're a comic book nerd, you've been laughing ever since the pilot of Arrow, where it was revealed that Oliver Queen's ex is named Laurel Dinah Lance.  As readers of the comic books know, Dinah Lance was both Queen's on-again / off-again girlfriend, but also the superheroine known as The Black Canary.

In a series that doesn't like to use the colors, it's time for a change.

Now, I know what some of you comic book nerds are thinking -- why isn't she wearing the traditional fishnets that have been part of the black canary character since seemingly forever?  After all, they even made a joke about Laurel and fishnets back in season 1.

Answer: because fishnets make no sense on this show.

Also ... a night stick? Why a night stick?  Um, because her father's a cop.

I like the look, and the wig makes a lot more sense in this context than it ever did with the other Lance sister, Sarah .... who was already a blonde ... but that was the only way to get the comic book color down correctly, I guess.

TV Review: The Flash

If you've seen Arrow, you know the premise before you even start the episode.  Barry Allen, CSI, is struck by lightning that had been altered by the explosion of a super-collider. It throws him through shelves of chemicals, just for good measure.

When Barry awakes from this, it's nine months later, the woman he grew up with, Iris, is dating the perfect cop, the world has moved on ..... and Barry can move faster than a ray of light.

The interesting part of the show is how they've decided to develop their rogues gallery. The explosion that created him unleashed all sorts of theoretical elements upon the city, warping and shaping various and sundry people in multiple different ways. It's a nice, simple way of pulling this off, and much better than what was initially done on Smallville -- which, if you remember, consisted of radiation from kryptonite creating a host of different mutations on parts of the population -- which was a cheap way of turning Smallville from Kansas into the Hellmouth from Buffy the Vampire Slayer.

The short version is that I like this series.  Character traits are quickly and easily set up. Barry is basically a good kid with a backstory that originally had him as the police department's Mulder. We've got the tinkerer, the misanthrope, the mentor (who's looking a little sinister by the end of the episode) and the love interest who friend-zoned Barry in the first three minutes of the episode.

And there are enough little details to satisfy most people. During a monologue, Barry Allen declares himself the Fastest Man Alive, the tag on half his comic books.  The news station is channel 52 -- like the New 52 of the DCU.  There are minor cops brought in from all over the comic books, One of the reporters is a Linda Park, who married Kid Flash in the comics.  Barry's father is played by the actor from the original 1990 Flash tv show.  Ferris air, of Green Lantern fame, makes an appearance.

There's also a giant gorilla cage broken in the aftermath of the explosion. It's labelled "Grodd." If you've read the comics, I don't need to explain. If you haven't, there's no way I can explain it without it sounding stupid.

The short version: I liked this show. The cast aren't as deep as I would have liked, but it's only the pilot. As it stands right this minute, I'll happily watch the rest of the show. But since this is from the same team that brought you Arrow, we can only expect that things are going to get much better from here.

Fall TV? Already?

This must have been an interesting season of television in order for things to have gone so very, very strange. Usually, I don't get commercials for the new fall shows kicking around until August. That includes the mid-season replacements.

And while I liked more than a few shows this season -- and I'll review those a little later -- some of these look like fun. And between Arrow, Flash, Gotham, and Constantine, DC looks like it's going to go toe-to-toe with Marvel on television. You want to place money on who's going to win?

Coming this Fall.

THE FLASH  (The CW)


Oh, all right. Then there's the extended version.




GOTHAM (Fox)

This makes up for the poor, Smallville marketing Fox has subjected us to, lately.


GRACEPOINT (Fox)

It seems that Fox has decided to follow up on limited run series, after the 13-episode run of Sleepy Hollow. I'm only in it for David Tenant.


TRANSPORTER

I could never get into the series. And while I like Statham well enough, I was never his biggest fan. The tv show looks like fun though.



THE LIBRARIANS
This is a "Winter" release.... Yes, I liked the original tv films.  Yes, I'm such a nerd.

Nerd Rage: DC Reboot as "One More Day" gone mad.

Let me start by saying that this title is horrifically overblown.

Everyone who has kept up with the blog (or has even read the top five most read posts)  knows my opinion on Marvel.  I dislike how they screw with characters for their movie properties, or dissolve marriages in an arbitrary and capricious fashion with a ... deal with the devil? For most of this, I initially blamed Joe Quesada ... then I realized that most comic book arcs are proposed a year in advance, and I realized that Marvel would be feeling the effects of Joe Q at least until 2012.

My main complaint was that Marvel had MASSIVE, WORLD CHANGING STORIES...... that changed absolutely nothing at all.

When I initially discussed DC Comics, and what they've been doing, my complaint was that they kept shaking up their universe so much, the dust never had time to settle before they had another damn crisis. We were being Evented to Death.

And now, DC is having yet another "event," where they rewrite large parts of their own history.

In the past, when DC did this sort of thing, it was to make life easier on everyone.  DC Comics had the original "Crisis on Infinite Earths" in the 1980s as a way of consolidating their myriad universes -- Golden Age, Bronze Age, Silver Age, the Dark Ages -- and make them one universe.

Now it's starting to feel like One More Day all over again. (more below the break)