Signs you might be a Declan Finn Character

Over at the Mad Genius Club, Sarah Hoyt put together a list of signs that you might be a fictional character.

I looked at that and thought -- hey, great idea! How can I steal -- I mean, adapt it?

Because her list doesn't exactly apply to my characters. Heh heh heh.  Let me show you a few things.

1. Your life is, for the most part, boring. Weeks can go by, and you're not doing anything that would interest anybody but yourself. Then, something strange and / or explody happens in the middle of one of your boring, mundane tasks.

-- I like giving my characters hobbies. And the majority of their time is boring. Heck, how much of the first part of the Pius Trilogy was just "Here's the Vatican, here's Vatican security, this is how our day-to-day is."

2.... is similar to Hoyt's, but I think I'll combine that with #10, because there are differences.

3. You have family. In fact, you might have a more complete family tree than some real people. In some cases, Mormon geneologists are blinking going "Um, no" at how far back you can trace your family tree.

--This might have to do with the fact that I had a Sean Patrick Ryan in the far future BEFORE I wrote It Was Only On Stun! or A Pius Anything, and there will be a lot of the family business going around. And because when I develop a character, I write their biography (see #10)

4. There is Something Very Wrong with you.

--Come now, surely you must have noticed that everybody I've written is a little off. The Ryan family likes being shot at. Marco might be a serial killer. Matthew Kovach has barely started yet. And the less said about Middle Earth's Most Wanted Elven Assassin, the better.  Why is this? you ask. Probably because most of the people I know in real life are a little off.

5. You're a little paranoid, and cynical that the world is out to get you ... because the world seems to be out to get you. If Murphy's Law is religion, you must be a saint.

-- This is what I call the Die Hard 2 effect.  Remember how, at the end of the second film, John McClane's wife asks, "Why does this keep happening to us?" Almost all of my characters will, at one point or other, stop reflect on their experiences, and go "Seriously, Murphy, stop."

6. Your love life is slow, and gradual, with sudden sharp peaks along the way.

--For those people who have read Honor at Stake, I don't like to rush my romance subplots ... or main plots ... or anything like that.  My characters don't ever, EVER, leap into bed with another person. Because, I'm sorry, people who screw on the first date make be seriously worry about them. Honestly, who does that?

7. You feel pain, and you get hurt, but only by certain people, and usually by the end of the adventure.

-- Because if I had all of my characters be easily injured by every bad guy, they probably wouldn't survive to the end of the novel. And I grew up playing video games, so .... BOSS FIGHT.


8. You don't let pain or injury bother you until later.

--Based mostly on the fact that there are a lot of guys out there in SpecOps who essentially run on adrenaline until after.  And then they feel it.  Oh boy do they feel it.


9. Expect to be locked in a room with someone with whom you will generate some sort of spark -- romantic or antagonistic, or something interesting.

--Because I grew up on The Prisoner and Babylon 5 (when J. Michael Straczysnki locks two people in an elevator, he really locks them in an elevator.)


#10.  You remember being shot at. A lot. And frequently.  And you remember all of them in insane detail.

--This is because some deranged nutcase can't start a backstory without writing a short story.

Music to write to: Babylon 5: Into the Fire

Okay. A few things.

One, a new review of Honor At Stake comes to us from the award-winning author Karen Kelly Boyce.  Let's just say that if you wanted a Catholic review of the book, you're going to really get it from Karen there.

Other things.  Well, we're up to sixteen reviews on Honor At Stake.  Yes, 16, already.  That's already better than one review a day.  I wish I had known that this would be the case when I started. I would have done ARC copies many moons ago. And many books ago.

I'm sorry if I'm starting to slow down, or the quality of these posts are dropping. I'm doing my best, but most of my days are spent marketing. Or planning for marketing.

Anyway, our music today is the final cut I've got left of all the B5 music from the long ago departed video game.

Enjoy all.

I'm going to take a nap.

Music to Write to: Babylon 5 video game music returns

Why a music blog today?

Because I expect to brace for impact with all of the anti GamerGate folks trolling the internet.

Because I've spent a lot of time yesterday spreading reviews of the book everywhere, I've been beta-reading someone else's book, and because I've had people tell me that they can't write to music that has lyrics.

Yes, I've been busy.

And so, it brings us to today's music choice.

A while ago, I posted some bits of soundtrack from the aborted Babylon 5 video game.

Now, parts of this soundtrack will sound familiar if you kept up with every last bit of business that Babylon 5 has done since then -- like Legend of the Rangers or The Lost Tales.

Sit back, relax and enjoy.

.... And listen to it as you read Honor At Stake

What? You didn't think I was going to go an ENTIRE day without mentioning it once, did you? I have a publisher to answer to now. :)

A FANifesto

"We hear that you want to redefine fandom."

Apparently, it has become a thing out on the web to stigmatize anyone "normal."

"Normal" in this case is odd, because this version of normal casts so wide a net that, for the first time in my life, even I come under it.

Basically, if you are a straight white male who does not read "important" science fiction, by the "right" authors, you are not a true science fiction fan.

Oh reeeeeaaaally?

Wait for it ...

Wait for it ...

...

...

ARE YOU PEOPLE F***ING STUPID? WHAT SORT OF ABJECT F***ING MORON EVEN TRIES TO THINK LIKE THIS? ARE YOU BORN BRAIN DEAD, OR DID YOU HAVE TO BE DROPPED ON YOUR HEAD A MILLION TIMES TO BE SO DEVOID OF BRAIN ACTIVITY, AND YET STILL BE ABLE TO OPERATE A KEYBOARD?

*Pant* *Pant* *Pant* *Pant*

Ahem.

As I was saying, this is an idea that is devoid of serious content and thought. It makes one wonder what the author was smoking at the time that this particular proclamation was made.

DragonCon report #2: Babylon 5 and Firefly

Wonder Woman at DragonCon

[No, I will not be doing a 9-11 article this year. Everything I could say in the matter was covered last year.]

Believe it or not, I didn't get into a lot of panels at DragonCon because they were standing room only, and not even that. The Lord of the Rings panel was crowded out, Torchwood panels were crowded out, even guests Adam West and Burt Ward (Batman and Robin from the 60s) had so many fans that the place was crowded out.

However, as John Ringo has said, what happens at DragonCon, stays on YouTube.

So, who needs to go when stuff is being filmed?

Answer: Me. Much of what I did go into didn't even get put online.

So, one panel, which I didn't get into, is a Firefly panel.  For those of you who don't know Firefly, it is a sci-fi western of Joss Whedon's from about ten years or so ago.  This panel had Sean Maher, Jewel Staite, and an appearance from Adam Baldwin -- his first appearance in years, since he was busy working on a show called Chuck.





Below the break, Babylon 5 stars Mira Furlan and Bruce Boxleitner (aka: Tron), discuss their work on the show.

Troubles and Tribulations

REVIEWS OF BOOKS YOU (PROBABLY) NEVER HEARD OF. PART 2: Tribulations

Reporter Susan Randall is going through the worst time of her life, as is LA. It begins with a typical ride-along with a local patrol car, usually a serene, boring assignment; and it is, until she gets shot. It gets worse: a serial killer is having a fun time in Los Angles, slicing through the homeless population. Each victim is mutilated in a less-than-typical fashion: their hands are sliced in such a way that they riffle like a deck of cards when touched. Susan wants the case, and gets it and everything that comes with it.

“Everything” includes not only the killer sending her e-mails, but a man named Raymond Weil, who keeps showing up: first at the crime scenes, then at the funerals of the victims. Despite his claims of demonic involvement in the murders, Raymond knows more than the police do about the serial killer and makes for a great lead for the story. 

That is, until Susan suspects he knows too much.

As the search for the killer proceeds, Susan becomes intrigued by Weil’s life and his continued persistence in relating the demonic to a serial killer. Before too long, she discovers an unnerving secret that causes her to suspect Raymond shouldn’t know some of the things he knows, especially as the City of Angels slowly becomes more like a city of Hell.

Joseph Michael Straczynski is the creator of the television series Babylon 5, wrote over one hundred episodes of miscellaneous TV programs, ran Amazing Spider-Man and Thor for several years, and will soon take over writing for Superman and Wonder Woman comicbooks. Straczynski’s style is often marked by creative wit and a keen observation of society at large. Tribulations is no exception. Throughout the novel, he uses his years of experience in Los Angeles with his graceful wit and driving narrative that forces the reader to push on. Despite his claims of atheism, one would hardly suspect it with his knowledge of past demonic incidents—both in theological and pure historical terms.

There is one mistake you should not make before you continue reading: that this is a spiritual novel. Whether you are Freud, the next generation, an atheist theology major, or a Catholic priest, you can enjoy this book. One might say Straczynski is part Walker Percy and part Jeffery Deaver: humorous, thrilling, and just dark enough to make you look in the closet, just to be safe. Straczynski uses his considerable talents to merge psychology, sociology, and theology into a story that unites profiles of serial killers, the sociology of a riot, and a profile of evil.
 
Truly something for everyone.

Music blog: Babylon 5 & Tom Smith

This is the last cut of the music from the aborted Babylon 5 video game from last week. It was fun while it lasted.

And now, the parody version

Music: Epic Video Game music

Yesterday, I started a series of music clips that should have gone with an aborted Babylon 5 video game. However, it was over an hour of music, and even what I posted yesterday was a little much.

I hope you enjoy

Inspiring Authors: J. Michael Straczynski

Every once in a while, I look over my writing style, and I look at what I've taken away from the authors I've been exposed to.

The first, and most important writing influence is someone named J. Michael Straczynski (JMS).

JMS, who I have mentioned once or twice, was an executive producer on Murder, She wrote, created Babylon 5, and writes almost anything else he can get his hands on. He's written comics, TV, novels, science fiction, battling demons....

Just look him up on amazon, buy everything except for “Rising Stars” and “Supreme Power.”

I'm not joking. Go now.

If you saw Thor -- and who didn't? You didn't? Go see it. I'll wait..... Back now? You liked it? Good. -- JMS had a cameo in the film as the first fellow to find Thor's hammer, and organized that big sequence with trying to drag out the hammer with a truck.

There is Tribulations, a book about demonic possession in modern LA. Surprisingly well put together and very religious ... And he's an atheist. So, he at least knows how to appreciate religion, even if it's only for use as fantasy fodder.

Neil Gaiman, Minnesota, and Writer's Mistakes.

Writers make mistakes.

This is probably not a good topic to discuss on a writer's blog, but it's the truth. And I try to serve the truth as often as possible without getting myself into even more trouble than I find naturally. People can learn from mistakes, even if those mistakes are performed by other people.

Neil Gaiman is a British author with a couple of novels to his name, and several tv episodes. I only enjoyed two works by him – Neverwhere, and The Graveyard Book. The one other book of his I truly enjoyed is called Good Omens, and there is nothing he can say or do to prove to me that Terry Prachett didn't take over the book entirely.

Recently, Mr. Gaiman (I prefer to pronounce it Guy-mun, not “Gay-man”) spoke at a Minnesota public library. He made a four-hour public appearance, for which he was paid $45,000 dollars.

Yes, he made over $10,000 per hour.

Harlan Ellison, an author who has been writing since the dawn of time … or at least the dawn of modern science fiction … makes $10,000 for an entire convention appearance, and Gaiman isn't half as interesting as Ellison. Trust me, I've met Ellison, and I've seen Gaiman.

A Minnesota politician has referred to Gaiman as a “pencil-necked weasel-thief” for walking off with that much money for a measely four hours.

Gaiman, in his defense, has said that he wanted to charge far less. The library claimed that the money was earmarked for library events, and the earmark expiration date was almost up. They could either use the money, or lose it. So, he took the money, and gave some to charity, some to his agent, etc.

Now, after the politician made noise, Gaiman has turned around, and started exchanging insults with Minnesota, at least on his Facebook page, as he tries to defend his honor (or honour, if you wish to go British). And he's whining that he's being put on a Republican “hate list”....

Now, I don't know about you, but there's something wrong about the whole thing.

For instance, should I ever become interesting enough to be invited anywhere to speak, I'm going to wonder at being offer forty-five grand.

I can imagine the conversation going as follows.

“Hey, we really liked your book, A Pius Man. We want you to come speak here. We'll give you $10,000 an hour. Please?”
Me: [Blink, blink, blink.] “How much?”
“About $45K. Is that not enough?”
Me: “I didn't think I was that interesting. Why $45K?”
“Because that's our event budget. We have to use it, or we're going to lose it.”
Me: “By 'lose it,' do you mean it will spontaneously combust? Fall down a rabbit hole and disappear? Turn to ash?”
“No, the state will just take it back.”
Me: “So, gee, you can either give me all of the taxpayer's money that you still have in your budget, or you can actually let the taxpayers actually have it back? Gee, I'm so happy I can give you an excuse to spend money for the sole purpose of spending money, in the middle of a major recession. How about this: get stuffed. I want nothing to do with you idiots.”

But, now, Neil Gaiman is the persecuted one. Huh. Really? One, it's Minnesota, how many people would know anything was up if it weren't for Gaiman's replies? I know I wouldn't. Two, this sounds like the library wanted to burn through the cash it had, and claim "We used our event budget this year, give us the same next year."
So, an open letter to Neil ....

Dear Mr. Gaiman.

I know you're not from the United States, so let me give you some pertinent information about Minnesota.

Number one: Minnesota is odd. This is a state that gave the position of governor to a former pro-wrestler named Jesse Ventura. It also made a clown one of their senators – a man named Al Franken.

In terms you can understand: Politically, Minnesota is Lewis Carroll country. They have fallen down a rabbit hole, and they have have yet to come out again. These people make Wonderland seem reasonable.

Number two: You took the money. I don't care what you did with it, you took taxpayer money. In the middle of a recession. You claim you would have attended the event for far, far less. Did they make you take it? Did they hold you up at gunpoint and force a check on you? I don't care how you redistributed the cash, this was taxpayer money. If the public library couldn't burn through it in the time allotted, that was their problem.

Didn't you think it odd that a public library paid you more money than bigger talents would get for an entire science fiction convention? They used you to aid and abet government waste in a recession. You were an excuse to burn cash. Why? Best guess: In all likelihood, if the public library didn't spend the money, their budget next year would have been cut to match what they spent this year.

Number three: You're Neil Gaiman. Why are you getting into the muck and mire with hacks from Minnesota? Why? You did nothing illegal. Some Minnesotan called you names … highly unoriginal names … and you, you poor widdle baby, are up in arms over it. You declare yourself on a Republican “hate list.” Really? You're going to play the Nixon card? Let's avoid the fact that there must be more than one person for there to be a list. Also, just because the politician is a Republican, you're not a target of the Republican National committee. You're not Bill Clinton; there is no vast, right wing conspiracy out to get you. As far as I can tell, there's just one guy – one guy who you have decided to make far more interesting by engaging with him.

You, sir, are a writer. You should have a thicker skin than this.

In conclusion … What the hell are you doing? While I question the wisdom of taking the cash, and thus exposing yourself to this idiocy, you are now actively diving into the muck and mire that is the cesspool of Minnesota politics. Do you think that a guy from Minnesota will affect your popularity in any way? If you hadn't decided to engage, I probably would have never heard of the quote, the politician, and I might have been safe from hearing anything about Minnesota until the next time Al Franken ran for political office.

This isn't your problem. Whoever paid you the money “just to get rid of it” shouldn't have burned through the money because it was there. That person should be fired. While I question your wisdom in taking the cash, you did nothing against the law. Why are you defending yourself against a gnat?

Stop playing silly buggers with rejects from the madhouse. Just tell these idiots that you didn't set the price, and if they're going to insult you, tell them to hire Terry Prachett as their speechwriter.

Thank you.

PS: The only Republican I know who may have an opinion on you is President George W. Bush -- and that's only because he liked Babylon 5: a show you wrote for.

Authors I Am Thankful For

Thanksgiving and Black Friday are over. Everyone, welcome back.

This is probably something that should have been posted on Thursday, but everyone was probably busy this weekend.

In my life, few authors have affected me in any way, shape or form. Most of it affected me in a professional manner. From Joseph Garber's Verticle Run, I learned how to start a thriller that didn't stop from start to finish, and while he was recently trumped by Matthew Reilly and James Rollins, Garber is where to start.

Few authors have ever actually had an impact on my life in general. And by few, I mean three. And, technically, I wasn't even the one who really felt the impact for two of the authors … it's a long story.


Terry Pratchett and Neil Gaiman

Once upon a time, I had considered getting a friend of mine a gift for his birthday. The novel was Good Omens, which was essentially Murphy's law as applied to the apocalypse— losing the antichrist, for example. It was fun. Strange as all hell, but fun. Neil Gaiman still insists that he wrote some of the funny parts. I thought my friend would like it.

Meanwhile, in another part of the internet, a woman was trying to remember the title of a novel she had read once upon a time. She signed into her dating website of choice, and came across the novel in my friend's profile. The book was Good Omens.

That relationship culminated in the marriage from two months ago.....

J. Michael Straczynski.

Way back in the 1990s, there was a television show called Babylon 5. It was a science fiction program that was less about special effects, latex masks and tight body suits, and more an epic about character. It was essentially a filmed novel. Like War and Peace, with one-tenth the cast. It was interesting enough that I would spend time with my family pondering what would happen next.

Along the way, when I was sixteen, I started writing what is unfortunately known as fan fiction. I had written stories based off of throwaway one-liners in the series. And while I touched nothing of the actual series storyline, I had a few concepts that the show didn't expand on, and spun that off into little corners of the universe, and aside from the first two books, it basically became its own series. I started rewriting what was a fan fiction quartet of over two thousand pages, and I'm now on book 6 of a possible 13 that I've outlined...

One of the artifacts I had picked up because of Babylon 5 is a leather bomber jacket. It had a great big gold embroidered 5 on the back, in the style of the show, and the show logo on the front. I have worn it every winter when the temperature dropped below forty, and there was no precipitation. This includes my days in college, when it was just too cold to wear a suit jacket.

One day, in 2001, I walked out of a class called the History of Terrorism, and one classmate had noticed the jacket. We walked and talked across the university's great lawn, past the library, an administrative building, and to the other side of the campus, until my ride literally started the car, pulled up behind me, and flashed his brights at us.

A month ago, I was a groomsman at his wedding.

A few years afterward, during my abortive attempt at a PhD in history, I drove down to a social in Manhattan, wearing the same jacket. Someone behind me said, “Cool jacket, I know that show.” He hasn't stopped talking to me since. Two months ago, I was the best man at his wedding... the one made possible by Terry Pratchett

I've heard people tell me that reading is an anti-social activity. Obviously, they've been reading the wrong books.