6 Years. and 800 Blogs later, Still alive

When I started this blog five years ago, it was to drum up publicity for A Pius Man: A Holy Thriller, book one of what would become The Pius Trilogy

After a while, it was the only way to sell my books.

Then I went rogue from my agent, and did the entire Pius trilogy myself. Books two and three came out in 2014.

Now, six years since we have started, and 800 blog posts later, I guess we should be looking back and asking: what the hell are we still doing here?  Especially now that the Puppies have taken over the blog?

You'd think that this would be something obvious.  Look above, under the giant blog banner. You'd think I don't get much clearer than that.

But, when I posted one of my Sad Puppies Bite Back posts over in the comments of a blog called File 770, I was met with some ... interesting replies in the comments. Including derision, people who thought that SPBB was about threatening the anti-Puppies, and people who wondered what the site was even about.

And people wonder why I don't read comments on most websites. The term "cesspool of stupid" comes to mind. Who allows these people out in public? There should be a license to be on the internet some days.

Not that I'm cynical or anything.

But, it did occur to me that there would be some people confused about what this site's common thread was, considering we've veered so wildly from the original point of glorified marketing.

So, what's it all about?

It's about stories. How do you create them? How do you shape them?  How do you assemble dreams when the world is so busy trying to stomp on them and take them away from you? That's why I dissect political opinions of Superheroes, or examine bad comic book storylines, or try to predict where things are going.  That's why I look at faith in fiction, to see just how much of the writer goes into the story, and how much should go into the story.  This blog will also address the Catholic faith in particular because, well, I'm Catholic -- it's part of me, and who I am, and part of my stories, so it comes with the package.

But, as fiction is not just about how a story is made, but also about the process of selling it. That's why I look at women in fiction, or the politics of publishing, etc.

Also ... it's about marketing. I'm not dead yet and I'm still writing and publishing books. I have a publisher now, and I'm not afraid to use them.

(Honor At Stake, now #2 suggestion for best novel for Sad Puppies 4 -- subtle plug, subtle plug).

That's why I allowed my brain to be taken over by a parody universe that won't leave me alone. I mean, it's not like I can make money on Sad Puppies Bite Back yet, despite how popular it is.

Okay, I may not be able to make money on it at this point. May. Not.  Why not?  Because I use the real names of real people, like George RR Martin, and Scalzi, and the Haydens, David Gerrold, Moshe Feder, and additional psychos.

Yes, they're parody -- and boy, are these guys a parody -- but there are also lawyers, and you don't need to have a leg to stand on to file a lawsuit. And while I would probably win any lawsuit, and any countersuit, the legal fees would probably kill me before we got to the countersuit phase.

However, there might be a few ways in order to rub the serial numbers off of this. Only if I scrub really, really hard. If you've looked at Set to Kill, you probably have a good idea of what I can do for Sad Puppies Bite Back, if I work at it.

And, of course, now that Sad Puppies Bite back is up for two different Hugo awards? I should at least consider publishing it.

If it gets a Hugo Nomination? It's more than likely I will publish it. Why? Because it would be a Hugo nominated work, and I don't think anyone would want to draw attention to the fact that they are so thin-skinned, they can't take a joke.

But, one disaster at a time, folks. One disaster at a time.

However, even if I can't sell it, Sad Puppies Bite Back has brought hundreds of people to my blog, and has improved my sales a lot. It won't get me into the big money territory, but it's a lot more than I've been getting.

It's also gotten me some interesting friends along the way, which is an improvement for an introvert like me.

So, to the trolls who lurk under the bridge at File 770, that's what the blog is about.

As for all you newcomers who want a laugh, or want a book recommendation, or some music to listen to as you pen your destruction of an alien civilization, or comic book trivia, or just want to look into the brain of a deeply deranged writer, welcome, my friends, to The Pius Geek.

The party is just warming up.

Because of this mischegas that is my life, I've made some great friends, like Sarah Hoyt,  Ann Margaret Lewis, Karina Fabian, Daniella Bova, Daria Anne DiGiovanni, Margot St. Aubin, Dawn Witzke, and Matt Bowman, the Novel Ninja.

I've read some awesome books, like Amy Lynn, Ordinance 93, The Watson Chronicles, the Book of Helen, Stealing Jenny, and a whole slough of others. Slew? Slough? Oh, you get the idea.

Kia

And these people.  Wow.

Heck, due to Kia Heavey, I have a new model for Manana Shushurin, now that the previous model is far, far too respectable to be associated with the likes of me.  She was before, but I guess she finally figured that out. :)  Kia is an author, and I recommend her books. Heck, I have.

Ann and Karina have been responsible for dragging me into the Catholic Writer's Guild. And if they weren't (it's been so long, they may not have), they're a large chunk of the reason I've stayed.

There's the CLFA, and that's also a long story.

Margot was largely responsible for the gun shop visit of 2014, and accompanied me to the first Catholic Writers Guild conference that I was a guest at.

I've lost some good friends.  One of my first beta readers for A Pius Man died before it was published. The first artist for the site, with whom I was acquaintances since college, and I drifted apart.

This blog caught me one of my best friends, author Rebekah Hendershot, and we managed to burn that bridge, with each other still on it. Heck, we burned that bridge so thoroughly, I think I've completely edited her out of the history of the website, with perhaps one exception.

Yeah. When things go badly, they go badly.

This blog has gotten me some of the best things in my life, and has taken away a few.  It's been a bumpy ride, almost from day one.

Along the way, I've shared with you how I invest myself in my work, dissected my life to show you how it enters my writing, given you the story of everything that has been important in my life. You folks know when I'm single, when I'm hurting, and when I'm going to lose myself in video games.

Mandy

I've shared my wonder at emerging technology, my irritation at politics and the comic book industry, my love of reading and even the music du jour.

I'd like to thank you all for putting up with me that long. I never thought I was that interesting.  This blog has lasted has still longer than some relationships I've had.

And now, I have an almost constant readership of over 4000 people a month, give or take a few hundred.

Now if only you would all buy The Pius Trilogy, Honor at Stake and Codename Winterborn....

Yes, I'm joking.  But you can't blame a guy for trying, can you? :)

Looking back on some of the strangeness, these are the all-time top blogs ever read on this site as of this minute.

1) Who would Captain America vote for? An election special:
This one is still on top. Odd though, huh?  Written back for the Presidential election of 2012, I was fed up with politics, and thought it much more amusing to speculate on what comic book characters would vote for who. I still like it better than most modern politics.  The hits on this one used to equal an entire month of viewership on the blog....

But then #2 happened.

2) Sad Puppies Bite Back.
The first journey down the rabbit hole. Yes. It was a one-shot that spiraled so far out of control, I really don't see the end of it. But people are still coming to the blog just to read them.  I'd publish these, but I'd really like to avoid being sued by David Gerrold or John Scalzi, or any of the other Puppy Kickers.

This is where it started, with Larry and Brad and Sarah.  And from what I've found? All of them I've SWATted found it funny.  Who knew?

3) Sex, DC Comics, and ... wtf?
Yup, it's still here. Right after the dawn of DC's New 52 Universes in 2011, the comics had gone into a sideways spiral of strange. I think this had something to do with sex being in the title.

4) This one is also still here.  Waaaay back in 2010, I ripped apart all of the Disasters to Marvel At: A Comic Discussion, with every stupid decision that Marvel comics had made for the previous 5 years.  Sadly, some of those decisions are still going strong.

5) Sad Puppies Bite Back (Part two)
This is where things start going really odd. And I probably should have seen it coming that things were going to really go sideways ... "sideways" as in "The Puppies have taken over my blog."  I think part one got suggestions of nominating this for a "Best related" award from the Hugos.

6) Cry Havoc! And Let Slip the Puppies of War!
This was after the Entertainment Weekly's libelous article about Sad Puppies, written and published without talking to anyone within Sad Puppies. At all. Yes, really.  Believe it or not, in retrospect, this was not what got me really into the Sad Puppies bandwagon. That was when someone decided to go after Brad Torgersen's wife. Then, then I had a meltdown, and decided someone needed a stern talking to.

7) Puppies Come to WorldCon  (SPBB III)
This was going to be The End. Period. Dot. Final. The last straw. The Puppies were going to come to the Hugos, and it would have to end there. Why? Because there would be nothing left for me to write until the Hugos came out. It was a perfect out, right? Right?

8) Snarky Theology 4: "Things that go boink in the night."
Yeah, this one is still here.  From the Easter of 2011, it's still on the top ten list. I can't get rid of the damn thing. I had tried to play nice and explain my faith, and tenets of Catholicism to the average person.  That ended in disaster and a flame war, and a few other things going wrong along the way.

But, once again, Sex scores well on the site.

This is still freaking strange for a blog all about Catholic thrillers.

9) Sad Puppies Bite Back XI: Puppies with Teeth

Yeah ... I'm not sure what part brings people to this chapter of SPBB than any of the others. Is it SWATting Jim Butcher or Peter Grant? Shadowdancer? Having a final reckoning with Andrew Marston?

Yeah. I have no idea.

10) And a surprising newcomer, a post I only published about three weeks ago: #SadPuppies ask -- who's rabid? It was a brief look at some of the psychosis among Puppy Kickers ... maybe Puppy Kickers adjacent ... and John C. Wright, Vox Day, and File 770 linked to it.

This is going to be an interesting year.

Photos of the Catholic Writer's Guild Conference, Live!

Yeah, I had some fun.

Especially when you got to Karina Fabian and her laser cows.  Yes. That happened. Take a look, you'll see how my brain works. Or doesn't.

The following are random things I've found at this conference over the course of three days. Some are shiny. Some are people. Some are shiny people.

Enjoy.

Cutesy stuff

Catholic Writer's Conference Live! 2015 Blogging panel

A little more on how I spent my week.

Catholic Writer's Conference Live! 2015 Catholic fiction panel

Guess how I spent my week.

The joy of street corners, and politics all the way down

So, I was sort of quiet this weekend, wasn't I? I didn't even have a blog post discussing the next radio show.

Well ... did I ever mention I live on a corner?  A corner that does NOT have a two-way stop sign?

What happens when a body (of a sports car) meets a body (of a Jeep Liberty) driving through New York?  You get a nice game of pool.  The little white sports car is the cut ball. The blue Jeep is the 8 ball.

My house is the corner pocket.

For the record, DO NOT WORRY. Everyone here is fine.  The firemen came in and checked our foundations, etc.  We're good.  Unlike the last time, we didn't even lose any bushes.

Yes, this is the second time this has happened in the last few years. Yay.

Oh, yeah, IT TOOK OUT MY FIOS INTERNET CABLE.

Fun fun fun for the whole family.

But I managed to get online for the radio show anyway.

I'll be on and off for the next few days.  As I noted, I'll be driving to NJ for the Catholic Writer's Guild conference.

But, before I leave you with the radio show from yesterday, I must note that ANN MARGARET LEWIS WILL BE ON THE SHOW THIS SUNDAY!!!

If you're wondering "Who?" You must be new here. Come back on Wednesday. 3:-)

Check Out Military Podcasts at Blog Talk Radio with We Built That Network on BlogTalkRadio

I will be at the Catholic Writer's Guild Conference (Happy Fourth)

I've started my celebration of Independence Day by watching ... Independence Day... and 1776, as well as Yankee Doodle Dandy.

Because I am a huge freaking nerd.

Previous 4th posts include

God Bless the USA.

And one of the first top ten blogs lists.  Huh.

Anyway....

Oh, by the way, I haven't mentioned this yet: I'M GOING TO BE A GUEST AT THE CATHOLIC WRITER'S GUILD CONFERENCE, LIVE! IN SUMMERSET, NJ!

Yes, if you want to come and hunt me down in person, click here.  Sign up! Come at me, bro.

If you don't believe I'll be there: Here I am.

TONIGHT ON THE CATHOLIC GEEK: Karina Fabian and Infinite Space Infinite God!

Remember when I took a look at Karina Fabian's Infinite Space Infinite God II? It was an anthology of Catholic Science fiction. It was odd, but fun. Like every anthology I've ever read, it had some hits and misses, but it was overall fun.

Now, tonight, on the Catholic Geek, I have Karina and one of her authors from the original ISIG (and ISIG II) Colleen Drippe.

Tonight, at 7PM, EST, I will have both Colleen and Karina On my radio show.  Keep in mind this link right here will not play anything until that time.

What I will cover, to my chagrin, will be Pope Francis, his global warming encyclical, and his statements on guns. Oy.

Remember, this IS a call-in show. You CAN call in. The number is in the link.

If you are seeing this post AFTER June 28, 2015, at 7:00PM EST, this player below should work

Should being the operative word.

Check Out Culture Podcasts at Blog Talk Radio with We Built That Network on BlogTalkRadio

Sad Puppies Bite Back IX: SWATting The Wrong Puppy

For previously on, click the Sad Puppies Link above.

So, I had a conversation with Katie Paulk, the Leader of Sad Puppies 4 in relation so various and sundry topics. While we had this conversation, she corrected a few things about how I SWATted her last time, in episode III.

When I joked that she may have to be SWATted again, she laughed and said sure.

The short version?  This is not the puppy you want to screw with.

Also, I asked Margot St. Aubin if she was interested in joining in. She said sure, why not?

KATE "THE IMPALER" PAULK

ROUND TWO

[SWAT Captain arrives at the scene of the SWAT call.  There are no impaling stakes, just a house. He has the SWAT van pull up to the house.  He comes out in his dress uniform, the rest of the SWAT team piles out in full armor. The SWAT leader sighs]  A field of stakes, huh?  Give me a break.

[SWAT leader goes up to door. Knocks. It opens to The Impaler, Kate Paulk. She is of sturdy build, round face, brunette.  She smiled, and said with a light Australian accent] Hello, can I help you?

[SWAT leader] Ma'am, my men were here the other day, telling me about a field of impaling stakes, dried with blood?

[KP laughs] Oh, those. They were nothing. I got them used off of ebay -- hence the blood. I returned them. I mean, who sharpens them?  Ideally stakes aren't sharp. They're well-rounded and greased / oiled to make the experience last longer.

[SWAT leader nods slowly, and says with forced casualness] Oh, really?

[KP nods pleasantly]  The main reason I don't impale people is that it's so hard to get the blood and stuff out of the carpet, you know?

[SWAT leader looks over her shoulder] To address the phone call we got, there is no one around here waving a weapon around?

[KP laughs] Not for days. My husband isn't here right now, and sword sparring is on Fridays. And, damn it, the Evil Lord of Evil keeps luring my minions away, so I'm left with the cats. Okay, they're dangerous enough, but still, stupid Vox...

[SWAT leader] So, the short version is that you don't have any weapons around here aside from swords?

[KP smiles] Didn't say that.

[KP points to a button inside the doorframe.  It is a great big threatening button that must never ever ever be pushed -- it says that on the label underneath the button] In case of emergencies.  It's amazing what you can do when you used to be a software tester.

[SWAT leader] So, not for us, then?

[KP blinks.  Her speech is a little slurred now, almost like she's drunk] Nope. Not at all.

[SWAT leader]  Are you okay?

[KP] I'm narco...leptic. This happens.

[SWAT leader] Maybe we should

[KP falls forward against the inside of the doorframe, squashing big red threatening button]

[SWAT leader] Oh darn.

[Hilarity ensues. As do screaming. Running. Explosions. And flying Impaling stakes.]

Review: Specter

NOTE: I WILL HAVE MY OWN RADIO SHOW, THE CATHOLIC GEEK, STARTING JUNE 7TH.

In Bleeder, by John Desjarlais, we were introduced to philosophy professor Reed Stubblefield, who thought in Aristotle quotes. During a bit of R and R in the countryside, in a quiet, sleepy little village right out of a Miss Marple novel, he meets a priest, the local stigmatic. When the priest is murdered, Reed becomes the primary suspect.

What follows is an intricate, brilliant work that Agatha Christie would have been happy with.  Desjarlais' prose is tight, erudite and powerful. His vocabulary is well-used. He knows how to engage the reader, and is very good with turning a phrase.

I enjoyed this book, and I was surprised by the villain-reveal at the end. Five stars all the way.

In Viper, new names appear in the local church's book of the dead.  Except, none of these people are dead yet. When the names on the list begin to correlate to the fresh homicides in the neighborhood, it's clear that this is a hitlist.  At the bottom of that list is the former undercover DEA agent Selena De La Cruz. Selena's passions are guns, shoes, fast cars, and kickboxing, so if someone wants to kill her, it's going to be a fight they're going to regret. It was more of a thriller than Bleeder, though it's set in the same universe -- Selena is even dating Reed. This was a fun, solid ride from start to finish.

My only problem with the book was the unrealistic character of a DEA agent who was not only racist, but whose solution to everything was a SWAT team breaking down the front door (Seriously, how did the guy not get fired? Did he have a relative in the hierarchy? Was he a nephew to the AG?).  Even that only knocks it down to a 4.5 star rating.

Finally, we come to Desjarlais' third book, Specter.

In our opening prologue, a Cardinal is murdered in an orchestrated hit that looks like the end of a brilliantly executed caper movie ... only with an assassination.  The incident is loosely based off of the death of Cardinal Ocampo in 1993, which was presumed to be the worst case of timing and luck on the planet Earth.

But what if it wasn't?

16 years later, former undercover DEA agent Selena De La Cruz (of Viper) is about to get married to Reed Stubblefield (of Bleeder), and then the Vatican comes by and says "Hi, we think your family was in on the hit, and you were in town at the time."

Desjarlais

And we're off to the races.

A fun part of this is the dynamic between Reed and Selena.  Bleeder was very much Reed's book, where Selena first appeared. Viper was all Selena, with a few cameos by Reed.  Specter is their book. Even the alternating points of views (third person personal) are very distinct. Their chemistry is very much a part of the narrative as it is part of their relationship.  She's very a very tough, outgoing modern woman who has little problem with a shootout, and he's a quiet, bookish, old-fashioned gentleman who thinks in Aristotle quotes. And I really like these two together, even though we hadn't seen much of their developing relationship.  Looking at the two of them deal with the trials of dealing with the wedding is more than enough evidence for why these two belong together.

There's even one entire conversion that sums it up quite nicely.

Him "We're incompatible. I'm North Side, you're South Side. I'm Cubs, you're white Sox .... I'm publicly-employed pro-union Democrat for gun control and you're small-business owner-Republican with a gun....I drive a Volvo, you drive a Charger."
Her: "My godmother is very traditional and is having a hard time thinking of me as Selena Perez de La Cruz Stubblefield."
"You don't have to adopt my last name..."

See what I mean? They work so well together, I'm surprised more of this wasn't a romance novel.  I would have read it twice for banter like that.

Okay, the fact that John Desjarlais has a female badass teamed up with the nerd just like I did in The Pius Trilogy really doesn't have anything to do with my enjoyment of the book. Honest. It just works really well.  It's like Baldacci's King and Maxwell series -- they just have this great dynamic together. And if you don't like Baldacci, don't worry, that's the only overlap I can think of.

As for the rest ... if you're thinking that this is going to be exactly like Bleeder or Viper, it is and it isn't. The overall plot feels like an excuse to watch Reed and Selena on screen, which, frankly, I'm happy with. If you read Desjarlais' books for the intricate puzzle solving (like Bleeder), you're going to be disappointed. If you're in this only for a knock-down shootout (like Viper), you're going to enjoy the second half of the book a lot.

There is also the best look at supernatural phenomenon I've seen in years.  Even little conversations like "ever have a seance or use a ouja board? Those things attract all sorts of nasty things." Awesome.

However, if you want to read this book to follow Reed and Selena, dive right in.  As far as I'm concerned, these two are right up there with Nick and Nora Charles. And, from what I've heard, Chesterton Press wants more books in this universe from John Desjarlais, despite that it's "just" a trilogy.

Frankly, I own all six Nick and Nora Charles movies, so I'm perfectly happy with the idea that we'll see more of these two.

Black Friday Book Shopping list.

Once again, Christmas decorations went on sale in August. August!  ARRGGHH.

Anyway, black Friday is coming, and we must be prepared. This is yet another list to make your shopping lives easier -- for Black Friday, or for the upcoming Cyber Monday. I've reviewed some of these books (links attached), and others are new even to me, but have come recommended to me. You might want to try some of these items below.

A Pius Man: A Holy Thriller -- of course I'd start with my own novel. It's surprisingly well reviewed, no one hates it (yet, give me time), where I take the war to Dan Brown, and every other nimrod who thinks they can write bad history in a thriller and get away with it.

A Pius Legacy: A Political Thriller -- The villains who survived A Pius Man have decided that some payback is involved.  Step one? Kidnap the Pope. Then the fun really starts.  Surprisingly, this one had better reviews than the first.... also fewer. Anyway, please buy the book already. Thank you.

A Pius Stand: A Global Thriller (UPDATED, yes, this wasn't here last time.): The end of the trilogy. Saving the Pope has consequences.  And army. A war. And no quarter given. It's time to finish the fight.

And, while I"m doing this.....

Codename: Winterborn .... the "other" novel, also strangely well reviewed. Genre: character-driven scifi espionage. While on a mission to the Islamic Republic of France, Lt. Kevin Anderson's team is betrayed by the politicians who sent them. As the only survivor, Anderson must stop the senators involved before the next team is slaughtered on the altar of political greed. He's certain he won't survive, but he will make this sacrifice, for his Codename is Winterborn. I recommend this for all fans of Baen novels -- like John Ringo, David Weber, and even your straight up thriller writers, like Vince Flynn, Brad Thor, et al.

On with everyone else.

Several of the following books you may have seen before. Trust me, there's a reason they made one of my top reading lists.

Murder in The Vatican: The Church Mysteries of Sherlock Holmes -- if you've been reading my blog for a long time, you know that I loved this one, and I can't possibly recommend it enough.... and then there's The Watson Chronicles, which is even better.  The only books I will recommend over my own, and I'm told my books are pretty awesome, so, yeah...

The Book of Helen -- dang, this was a kickass little novel.  The West Wing meets the Trojan war, this novel goes beyond the "they all lived strangely ever after" of Helen of Troy, and follows the rest of her life after she came home from Troy.  Yes, Helen did have an "after Troy."  You know the mythology, and now, this is the rest of the story.

Ordinance 93:  I've reviewed this book, I've interviewed this author, and I somehow still haven't mentioned her on the blog yet. Ordinance 93 is a thriller that sort-of centers around abortion. It's not really a pro-life book, despite how I referred to it in the Examiner posts.  It's a very long story, but if you're interest, check out the review. It would take too long otherwise.

Mind Over Mind -- The short version? "No, he's not crazy, aliens really are messing with his brain."  Then there's Mind Over Psyche, which feels like CS Lewis' science fiction trilogy. Then again, Karina was already involved with a scifi-anthology, so, yeah...

Greater Treasures -- Imagine the Maltese Falcon with dragons. Nuff said.

Stealing Jenny, by Ellen Gable: After 5 miscarriages, Jenny is about to have a pregnancy come to full term... until a psychotic woman kidnaps her and chains her in her basement with the intention of taking the child for her own. I liked this one.

Amy Lynn: You can read my review right here.

Night Machines by Kia Heavey .... this one was interesting.  Almost Doctor Who-ish by way of Rod Serling.

And, of course, there is an endless list of books I can recommend, which happen to be a different tab at the top of the page -- includes Flynn, Ringo, Weber, Thor, etc, etc.

Now, as far as books I haven't looked at yet.... [Below the break.]

Taking a stand, for the last time.

Last week, I said that A Pius Stand is coming.

It's finally going to be over.

If you've been with this blog since the beginning -- or if you've read "Pius Origins" link on the sidebar -- you know that this started out as a history paper gone amuck. It was a graduate paper in which I examined the truth behind Pope Pius XII and the Holocaust.

SPOILERS FOR A PIUS MAN, but, what I learned from my research was simple. Pius XII did more than any one person to save people in Europe during World War II.  More POWs. More Jews. More refugees. Because life was precious, and if they didn't like it, they could just come and get him.

But if you read any media around Pope Pius XII, you get Hitler's Pope. And Susan Zuccotti. And John Cornwell. And Gary Wills and Michael Phayer. The Wiki page on it has become more balanced, but still incomplete. You don't even want to know what it looked like when I started writing.  All of these great big names trying to spin a story I know to be false, and I spent a whole four months looking at primary documents as a grad student in America. They were journalists and historians. They should have known better.

I don't like liars.

The Pius Trilogy started out as a devotion. One that I tried to make readable for everyone. I wanted the opening to be dark and ominous to trap anti-Catholic to reading on, until they are so hip deep in the book that by the time that the revelation is given, the trap springs shut.

END SPOILERS.

The short version is, this was a devotion.  This was to sing the praises of God and His followers. This was a devotion to the truth, and a war on lies. At the same time, I was making it readable for other people. Heck, one of my friends on Facebook became a friend of mine BECAUSE of A Pius Man, and she's Jewish, I can't make it too much more open and readable than that.

The reason my cast was so big was simple -- I wanted to make it clear that the truth was not some subjective moving target. I needed a doubter, a neutral party, two red herrings, confirmation of the mystery ... well, you'll just have to read it to perform that matching column.

But my premise was that of philosopher Peter Kreeft -- this was an ecumenical jihad, a war against one very specific force of darkness, and one that the religions in A Pius Man could get behind. Because the liars I've been fighting since the beginning all have one thing in common.  What is that thing? Read A Pius Legacy.

But then I couldn't get the Catholic Writer's Guild Seal of Approval for APM. Why? Because the book was too violent, and some poor little dear was squeamish. I know this happened because I had officers of the Guild come up to me and suggested that there needed to be changes in the was the Seal of Approval was handled. Devotion to truth? Devotion to God? Who needs it? I've got a gun-toting Catholic! Run!

Then I had one or two of those officers write positive reviews. I'll take it.

The reason I kept going was that some things needed to be said. Some things needed to be put out there and thrown at people's heads until they either take notice or are bludgeoned to death.  Because the truth is not a game, or a weapon, except against lies. Truth is what happened, and maybe we can speculate about reasons, or about the why of things, and sometimes people will leave a diary detailing what and why they did. Then we hope the poor schmuck isn't a schizophrenic or a pathological liar.

And I kept going because I had to. Because writing is all I have.

This trilogy has been my life for ten years. And now it's time for me to say goodbye.

Photos from the Catholic Writers Guild Conference.

There is a lot -- and I mean a LOT -- of photos from the Catholic Media Network conference. You can find them on my Facebook page. But if you aren't a fan of The Pius Trilogy on Facebook, you haven't seen them.

Now you can.

In the beginning, there were Catholic Teddy Bears. Lots of Teddy Bears.

I'm back! Action / Adventure panel at CWCL

The Catholic Writer's Conference, Live! action-adventure panel.

This will be an incomplete transcript of the entire panel, starring Declan Finn (me), Gene Wolfe, and John Desjarlais (French-Canadian pronunciation. Good luck) and Anthony Kolenc.

Now, there will be gaps here. I've forgotten most of what I've said, to heck with what anyone else said.  I'm going to ask anyone who was there to comment, and fill in the blanks. Anyone who posted to YouTube, please let me know, I'll post some here.

The moderator was the awesome and wonderful Ann Margaret Lewis.

Here we go.....

Q: Has a Saint's non-violence inspired you?

Declan Finn: Well, the closest I've ever come to that was with Thomas Aquinas. Like me, Aquinas was a nerd. He had only two real outbursts in his life.  One was when his family had hired a hooker -- a second one, because he converted the first -- only this one was more persistent in her job. Aquinas finally grabbed a burning log from the fireplace and chased her out, drawing a cross of fire into the door on her way out. I always liked that one if only for the comedy value. The second story was Aquinas at a party being held by King St. Louis. It was one of those "You've been invited. Go to the party, you'll have fun." During the party, he had a philosophical thought, rear up, and slammed the table, declaring "and that will settle the Manichees!" I've got a few characters who are also just as flakey.

Gene Wolfe: But the important part of that fight scene with the hooker -- and it was a fight scene, even if she just ran away -- was what was being defended!

JD: One of my earlier books was about a war that happened over a book. It was written back when I was still a Protestant. Who knew I was writing a Catholic novel?

Worst fight scene ever?
Declan Finn: Jack Higgins wrote a scene to the end of a family of villains who had been plaguing his heroes for books. It was a dark and stormy night, fighting on the roof.  The entire fight consisted of "They went at each other. They fought. They grappled, they rolled to the edge of the roof, and Rashid fell off."  He's been the bad guy for repeated books! I know fights are quick, but can I have a little more detail?

JD: The worst fight scene I've ever read was when a pivotal fight happened off screen, with no emotional payoff.

Q: Who can you give as an example of writing good fight scenes.
Lee Child's Jack Reacher.  Before every fight, there's a little dissertation on violence. It explains why he's targeting who he's targeting, and why he's hitting with what he's hitting.  And since Jack Reacher was 6'5" -- not Tom Cruise -- he was always being confronted by 5-7 people, and discussed group dynamics.

Ann: Do you think they stole that for the Robert Downy Jr. Sherlock Holmes films?

Well, for that, I can at least see Holmes doing it, because he's Holmes. He can play three-dimensional chess in his head.  As for stealing .... does Guy Ritchie even read? I know he was with Madonna for a while, so I wouldn't place money on it.

I also suggest James Rollins.  And for large scale battles, read Bernard Cornwell -- not John, Bernard -- who wrote the Richard Sharpe series. It was about the Napoleonic wars, and one of the few roles where Sean Bean did not die a horrible, horrible death.

[I got a few laughs there]

Q: Why do you write in your genre?
Declan Finn: Because thrillers are what people read. And I'm not going to write a romance novel.

What is your pet peeve about action scenes?

Gene Wolfe: When two guys are exchanging one-liners between punches. All of the one-liners in real life come before the punching starts. One of these days, I want someone to start a one-liner and get punched in the mouth.

[No, I don't remember what I said to that one. It's been a hard week]

Q: For science fiction and fantasy, it's easy to ignore tech or magic in order to have an exciting fight scene. (Remember how Indy shot the swordsman instead of the big scene they had planned.) How do you work around advanced tech that might make a dull fight?

Declan Finn: "I make it simple. I give all the advanced weaponry to the bad guys.  As for working around it -- the tech can be magical, but it's still run by people. People can be tricked. Confused. Or just plain stupid."

Gene mostly answered this question.  I don't remember his answer, though I want to have recalled it.  He also loved the Raiders swordfight cited above because that's very much how real fights go.


Q (from the audience): What makes a Catholic adventure?
JD: As Bilbo said in The Hobbit, "I'm going on an adventure!"  The first part of having an adventure is that you go out."
Me: I'm the simple one here. Catholic adventure? The priests aren't all Nazis. The Pope isn't evil.  There is good. There is evil. And evil must lose.

[I swear I had an "amen" at that point.]


Q (From the audience): "Have you ever had prayer, or angels, or a miracle to solve a problem? Something supernatural for a solution?"
Gene: "Yes, I did. I had one story where every time my main character would start praying, he would start to win."
Declan Finn: "Since I don't want it to be a deus ex machina, I do have a bit of a miracle in book three of my Pius trilogy, when the fecal matter hits the air impeller" [laugh].  "But it's like the old joke: A cop car goes up to a guy's house.  There's a flood coming. Get in the car. Guy says that God'll save me, God'll save my house. The next people to come by are in a boat, and they're talking to the homeowner in the second story window because that's where the water is.  Get in the boat, they say. Guy says that God'll save me, God'll save my house.  The next people to come by are in a helicopter, and the homeowner's on the roof. Guy says No, God'll save me, God'll save my house. Homeowner drowns.  When the homeowner asks, Why didn't you save me? God says 'I sent the cop, I sent the boat, I sent the helicopter, what more do you want?'  It's like that."

Then there were several great lines that I can't remember the context for......

JD: "The scene between Bilbo and Gollum in the cave is a buildup to Bilbo and Smaug later on, playing for much larger stakes. Setup, payoff."

JD: A fight has to either advance the story or the character.  You can't just have it to be there. It has to accomplish something.

[.... I hate him for that. He stole my line before I could say it. :)  Yes, I'm kidding. I love his novels Bleeder and Viper.  I should probably review then ... anyway....]

Declan Finn: "As was said by John, if it's going to bore the writer, it's going to bore the audience. I cut a scene from my novel Codename: Winterborn because there were too many fight scenes already.  But since the scene was something that had to happen for the story to move forward, and it was a navy SEAL versus some guys in the street, I boiled it down to a sentence of the aftermath, and moved on."

Gene Wolfe: "I'm glad to see that fighting men are wearing armor again. I had one of the first pieces of armor issued to the army. It was this big heavy nylon thing with lead squares, and it might as well have been made of solid metal. Anyway, during one time, this Lieutenant had come up on stage before the men, and he wore this bright green shining piece of armor with a string of grenades across the chest. It made him look like Flash Gordon. He had a truck of his new armor and he said "Is there anyone here who doesn't have armor?" I disconnected my straps, holding my armor up, and I shot up to the stage, saying "Me. I don't have armor."  And I got myself some shiny new armor, the first time it was given out to the enlisted men and not just officers.  Anyway, we made an about face, and marched out of the room, and there was my old armor, just lying there. The Lieutenant just laughed, picked up the armor, and threw it on the truck."


As I said, these are pieces and parts I recall from less than a week ago. Any help on filling in the blanks would be helpful

Review: Stealing Jenny

Remember once upon a time, when I mentioned that someone at the Catholic Writer's Guild came up to me, asked if I was lost, I introduced myself, and her eyes lit up and she said she was honored to meet me?

Ellen Gable wrote a book called Stealing Jenny, and mentioned that it would be free on Kindle early last week, and we could grab a copy and review it.

I shrugged, figured "If she likes my book, how bad could hers be," and decided to go for it. Lord knows enough people "Oooo"ed and "ahhh"ed over it while I was at the CWG conference. Might as well see what all the fuss was about.

So, where does one begin with Stealing Jenny?  [Below the break]

Black Friday blog: book shopping

I love Christmas, but I hate the Christmas shopping season. In my neck of the woods, Christmas decorations went on sale in August. August, blast it.

Anyway, realizing that, and that black Friday is coming up, I won't be doing a Thanksgiving day blog, and I don't have too much to add to my past blog entries on the matter.  However, if you want to know about cooking for 93, or the authors I'm thankful for.... you can check those out.

While I finished my Christmas shopping months ago (writers do it all year round -- write your own joke here) I understand that there will be an onslaught of people who are going to be trampling each other in order to get gifts for family and friends.

With that in mind, it occurred to me that this is going to be a great time to compile a list of suggestions to make your shopping lives easier -- if not for this Friday, then for the upcoming Cyber Monday. Some of these are books I've reviewed, and others are new even to me, but have come recommended to me. So, unless you're going to go out and buy some Darren Brown tickets, you might want to try some of these items below.

A Pius Man: A Holy Thriller -- of course I'd start with my own novel. It's surprisingly well reviewed, no one hates it (yet, give me time), where I take the war to Dan Brown, and every other nimrod who thinks they can write bad history in a thriller and get away with it.

Codename: Winterborn .... the "other" novel, also strangely well reviewed. Genre: character-driven scifi espionage. While on a mission to the Islamic Republic of France, Lt. Kevin Anderson's team is betrayed by the politicians who sent them. As the only survivor, Anderson must stop the senators involved before the next team is slaughtered on the altar of political greed. He's certain he won't survive, but he will make this sacrifice, for his Codename is Winterborn. I recommend this for all fans of Baen novels -- like John Ringo, David Weber, and even your straight up thriller writers, like Vince Flynn, Brad Thor, et al.

Murder in The Vatican: The Church Mysteries of Sherlock Holmes -- if you've been reading my blog for a long time, you know that I loved this one, and I can't possibly recommend it enough.

Mind Over Mind -- The short version? "No, he's not crazy, aliens really are messing with his brain."

Greater Treasures -- Imagine the Maltese Falcon with dragons. Nuff said.

And, of course, there is an endless list of books I can recommend, which happen to be a different tab at the top of the page -- includes Flynn, Ringo, Weber, Thor, etc, etc.

Stealing Jenny, by Ellen Gable: After 5 miscarriages, Jenny is about to have a pregnancy come to full term... until a psychotic woman kidnaps her and chains her in her basement with the intention of taking the child for her own. I liked this one.

Now, as far as books I haven't looked at yet.... [Below the break.]

Report on the Catholic Writer's Guild Conference. Live!

If you're wondering, like I did, why the CWG conference was "Catholic Writer's Guild Conference. Live!" (As opposed to what, Undead? No, only when Karina Fabian is President...just kidding). Actually, they have an online conference as well.

Anyway....

This post is going to be a collection of little events and moments that I really enjoyed.  I mostly went there just to hang out, and meet people that I only knew online. So I'm treating a lot of what went on as confidential.  There were one or two panels I went two that were just plain fun, and I'll write up later.

The CWG conference was in Sumerset, NJ.  While this is usually a problem for me-- like most New Yorkers, I believe Woody Allen's old line that "If Jersey's the punchline, you don't need the rest of the joke"--so I decided to go for one day.  Less time in Jersey, and, well, $40 cheaper. Did I mention I was a cheapsake? (Actually, I"m a writer in NYC, with these taxes, Donald Trump probably counts pennies here)

My arrival was surprising.  Not that the convention center and hotel were anything impressive. After going to DragonCon for five years, nothing impresses me anymore.

What surprised me was showing up at the registration counter, and having someone identify me by sight.

"Do you know who I am?" she asked. And, even if I didn't know my favorite Sherlock Holmes author offhand, I could clearly see her nametag.  Ann Margaret Lewis, author of Murder in the Vatican.

One of my favorite authors could identify me immediately. Squee!

I covered the exhibit hall in about five to fifteen minutes on the first round (later rounds would find the author of the Bad Catholic's Guide to Good Living, which I enjoyed quite a bit), then went to the CWG opening meeting.  Most of it consisted of what the Guild does, and how it operates, and how their Seal of Approval happens.

However, the panel consisted of three people I know / knew of-- Ellen Gable Hrkach (more on her later), Ann Lewis, and Karina Fabian.  In fact, at one point, before the meeting started, it was interesting. Karina Fabian was handing out slips for her free Kindle Download of Greater Treasures. She went through the room, handing them out.
She was about to hand me one, when I told her, "I read it."
"Great! Now you can review it."
I flashed her my business card. "I already did."
"John! You came!"  And she hugged me.
Come to think of it, I think she hugged me about 3-5 times that day.  I could be wrong.

After that meeting, there was coffee.  I hung around the coffee machine, planting flyers (because I'm stealthy like that), and taking them back when Karina Fabian handed them to me (she's better), and talking with a friend of hers, Arthur Powers, and someone else (I forget who).  When I mention my Anti-DaVinci Code, A Pius Man, I had positive reactions (which consisted of "Thank you, God! When are you published?"), Mr. Powers said, "I think I know that title. I handle all of them at CatholicFiction.net."

I didn't know my books were that memorable.

Oh, a random event.
Passerby: "Where's the CWG booth?"
Me: "Just go past Pope Francis and go straight up the middle."
Passerby: "Pope Francis is here?"
Me: "The cardboard cutout."
Passerby:  "Oh."

Later, in the exhibition hall, I chatted up the representative from the Chesterton Society, Richard Aleman. I later found out he was one of their authors.  I told him about my book, and my historian background, and promptly suggested I take a job with the Chesterton Academy, out in Minnesota. I was then informed that an editor from Chesterton Press (different organization) was looking for me, which was strange, because I had said hello to him that morning, making certain that my badge was at eye level the whole time.

So, I hung around the CWG booth, awaiting his return.

As I wander, meek and wary, I was approached by a youthful middle aged woman (when her hair is going slightly pale, and she has the energy of Stan Lee on a sugar rush, that is youthful middle age) who was about 4'11", maybe 5'.  She saw that my tag was CWG, and asked about what I wrote.
"I write under Declan Finn. I wrote a book called A Pius Man."
Her face lit up like a child on Christmas morning, and she shoot my hand vigorously, exclaiming "It's an honor to meet you. I loved your book. I know the review that I gave you wasn't a perfect review but it was an honest review, and that's important.  And you really should keep writing, no matter what anyone says because you're a great writer. Are you coming to my presentation later? Your book is on kindle, right? I'm doing a presentation on how to sell your kindle book, and you should come to it."
As you can tell, I paid attention to every word she said, but I was stuck at "You're honored to meet me?" [Blink, blink, blink.]
I think it was one of the happier moments of my life. I had fans. Who knew?
Oh, and "this one" is Ellen Gable Hrkach, the President of the Catholic Writer's Guild.
I told you we'd be getting back to her.

At the end of the day, it was a pleasure to finally meet all the folks who I've talked to for years. They are great, enthusiastic people, and I loved every one of them. It was a great opportunity, and I look forward to doing it again. (Yes, again. I have family doing something in Chicago next year, at the same time as the CWG conference is going on. I look forward to doing this again. If they're looking for a fighting and writing panel, they have my number. Hint, hint. :)